yeah so I’ve been with my girl for almost a year now met her on a matrimonial app and we clicked right away super strong emotional bond same wavelength intellectually and a fire sex life

yeah so I’ve been with my girl for almost a year now met her on a matrimonial app and we clicked right away super strong emotional bond same wavelength intellectually and a fire sex life. we’re both pretty open-minded about relationships and intimacy so everything felt perfect at first but lately some things from her past been messing with my head in ways I didn’t expect and idk how to deal
her past & the stuff that’s messing with me
she had three past relationships:
first one was long-distance no physical stuff
second was just exchanging intimate pics no sex
third was a FWB thing where she lost her v-card and explored a lot sexually
when we started talking she told me she wasn’t in touch with any of her exes but later I found out she still talked to her FWB. at first she played it off like they just sent reels on IG but over time I realized:
she talked to him about our relationship in the beginning even showed him my texts
she wasn’t honest about some details like if they used protection or what exactly went down
even after we got official she hit him up through a mutual friend just to say thank you and all the best
sex & the comparison problem
she did a lot with him like recorded vids etc.. so when we got together it felt like there wasn’t much left for us to explore
I saw the old vids and yeah that image is stuck in my head
she was super adventurous with him but more chill with me which makes me feel like I’m getting the toned-down version of her
he was taller and bigger and even tho she swears I’m the best she’s had I can’t shake the thought that I’ll always be compared
small stuff gets to me like how she hyped up his dick pics but barely reacted to mine she says it was just bc of the shock factor but still bugs me
she remembers their sexual experiences in detail but sometimes forgets stuff about ours which stings
where we’re at now
she says she loves me wants to marry me even calls me a sex god and outside of this issue we’re solid. both our families are involved and pushing for marriage but I can’t stop feeling like I’m getting the post experimentation version of her while her ex got the unfiltered excitement and passion.
I know it’s not fair to compare but these thoughts won’t stop they’ve caused fights wrecked my confidence and even led me to an unhealthy obsession with cuckold porn which I think is tied to this whole thing. I don’t wanna ruin a good thing but this feeling of not being the first and not getting that same passion is eating me up
has anyone else been through this? how do you move past it? any advice would help