It's been a month since I broke up with my fiancee, and it was really hard at first, I still miss him sometimes when we sit in separate rooms, but I decided I will not let people cross my boundaries like he did for months, I felt like a toy, like a doormat that will always wait for him, but I'm done, and honestly? at first I felt like I'm dying, but now I've never felt better. I feel like I regained control over my life, I don't need to check constantly if he cheats on me again and again, I just don't care, I'm not so scared anymore, because everything that happens to him right now, the people leaving when they find out about all the cheating and gaslighting he did to me, it's only consequences of his actions. I begged him to stop hurting me for months, and now I'm done, I feel way better, I'm working with amazing people, I met amazing guy and we went on a date last Sunday, I'm not looking for relationship with him yet, but he also helped me to understand that I don't need to beg for love and attention. My psychiatrist and therapist are proud of me, and I'm finally proud of myself
Last updated on:2026-03-05T21:20:45+05:30
Comments (7)
i’m really happy reading this, you sound stronger already. can i ask, when was the moment you knew you were DONE and the begging part of you finally shut off?
When I started to open up too much to people who knew the person he cheated on me with, and those people told him what I was saying about him, I realized I'm becoming someone I don't want to be, and I just decided I'm done. at first my ex was still trying to hug me, kiss me, Wich made me feel even worse, and just one random day I got angry that he treated me like absolute shit, and decided I don't want people like that in my life. And to be honest? Now I'm realizing that it was toxic from the beginning, from the beginning I wanted to save him from everything bad that happened to him, his feelings mattered to me more than my own feelings, I was trying to make him happy, and now I'm seeing how he used me untill I wasn't giving him everything he needed, and then he found someone else
honestly the part where you said you stopped checking if he was cheating hit me. that obsession drained me when i went through it.
Yeah, it was like a nightmare, now I'm so much happier, don't need him anymore. The guy I'm actually seeing showed me that I don't need to be someone else to feel important. The guy I met 2 weeks ago showed me more support than my ex, and we were together for 5 years
same i stayed with someone who cheated and gaslit me for months too, kept thinking if i just loved harder he’d stop. walking away felt like dying at first, then one day i realized i could breathe again. proud of you for choosing yourself.
I'm so proud of you and your boundaries because I know it must be challenging to keep them when you are still living together. I want you to know that you are worthy of love and respect. Look at just how far you have come. You definitely turned your breakup into a breakthrough. The caterpillar is definitely turning into a butterfly.
Definitely! After so may months I finally feel like his actions can't control me like they did when we were together