My long-distance boyfriend, whom I can’t meet often, is so controlling — or maybe he’s just insecure because he can’t see me while others can. He gets aggressive over small things, forces me to do what he wants, and sometimes even cries to stop me from wearing what I like or going anywhere.
He becomes emotional and angry about every little thing I do — like doing my eyebrows, talking to someone, or going out. I don’t know if he’s the right one for me or not. He’s so obsessed with me; he’s never been in a relationship with anyone else.
We’re relatives and have been in love since childhood. He always tells me I’m his first kiss, and he’s mine. The problem is that my parents are very protective and don’t let me go anywhere alone, so I couldn’t meet him. In three years of our relationship, we’ve only met once — and that was the day we kissed.
I’m an emotional and sensitive woman, and when he first started telling me what I should or shouldn’t do, I reacted too quickly. I got angry and emotional and told him not to do that again. Since we were texting, we couldn’t really understand each other’s tone or feelings, and things escalated. Over time, our relationship turned abusive — we started fighting every day, sometimes three times a day.
But no matter how many times we try to break up, we always come back to each other. If I give up, he comes back. If he gives up, I go back. It’s unhealthy — maybe because of him, maybe because of me, or maybe because of the distance.
Everything else is good — he’s caring, loving, and loyal. But when he gets too controlling, it makes me feel so uncomfortable because I’m an independent woman, and I hate being judged and controlled.
I'm Soo confused we love eachother but we're getting hurt and it's getting unhealthy for both of us as we're teenagers we cannot focus on our careers or anything else because of daily fighting idk who's wrong but ik that both of us are in love and loyal to eachother I need an advice what should I do ? rn I decided to stop texting him and blocked him everywhere.. to give him space maybe he'll realize that he's doing wrong and hurting me
Last updated on:2025-11-12T23:37:59+05:30
Comments (6)
you said you both keep coming back no matter how bad it gets… what do you think pulls you back each time the love, the memories, or the fear of losing him?
The love and the memories and also he fears to lose me but doesn't show that
you did the right thing by blocking him for now. it’s not about punishing him it’s about giving both of you space to actually breathe. sometimes when things get too tangled, silence is the only way to see things clearly. if he really wants to grow, he’ll use this space to reflect instead of chase. focus on your peace for a bit.
I have big goals to achieve and all I want is freedom and all I'm losing is freedom by being with him this is so hard for me
my ex used to cry and guilt trip me every time i wanted to hang out with my friends or wear something he didn’t approve. it took me a long time to realize that love isn’t supposed to make you feel trapped. distance or not, control isn’t care it’s fear dressed up as love. i can tell you still love him, but you also sound like you’re finally choosing you, and that’s brave as hell
You're right I've been asking myself is he right for me ? because I'm so unconfident in myself because of him I'm not feeling free