hello!
Context: Me and my ex boyfriend have been on and off for 3 years now. Im always the one to break no contact and ask for him back. He mostly out of the blue ghosts me and throughout the relationship would accuse me of stuff I didn't do. He said it was because there were rumors of stuff that I did and when I asked to talk about it he didnt want to say anything more. He told me to go get a boyfriend to move on and that he hates me more than he loves me.
The longest ive gone no contact was 5 months and ive only done that twice in the relationship. other times I would reach out after 3 weeks to a month.
Question: "If I were to break the 5 month cycle and go no contact for longer what changes would I see in myself and how would his feelings about me change."
Last updated on:2026-07-08T10:47:03+05:30
Comments (4)
i don't think anyone can tell you how an avoidant will feel after six months or a year.
i've been where you are, always being the one to break no contact because i couldn't stand the silence. the biggest surprise was that after enough time, i stopped checking my phone every five minutes and started realizing i was carrying the whole relationship by myself.
when he ghosted you, accused you of things you didn't do, and told you he hated you more than he loved you, what made you feel like it was your job to keep reaching back out?
hi, I reached out because I was trying to prove to him that I didnt do those things he accused me of and the more he would push me away the more I wanted to prove I was worth something to him . I also felt that if I kept fighting he would see that I cared