Hello!
I am currently day 49 of no contact and hope to reinvent myself in 100 days which would be about 5 months the longest ive gone no contact. I want to focus on myself specifically on academic, social life, self love and glow up The problem is its hard to reinvent myself when im not sure how to:
For example:
-Academics:
I want to focus on studies but its hard to do that when you dont know what to study. ( I changed my major twice and im an upcoming sophmore)so I often lack motivation.
-Social life:
I recently got asked to be in a sorority from a sorority girl which would keep me distracted and provide support but its very expensive but I do know clubs and mutuals may help. I often get homesick and leave every weekend. As well as being a germaphobe and Emetophobia (a thing I struggle with) so I avoid my friends when they feel under the weather and avoid drinking so i often miss out on cool events and oppertunities. ( I also felt like last year I wanted to be with my ex so much I would ask to be with him and when he harshly rejected me I was too upset to leave my dorm room and be with my friends)
Glow Up:
- Ive kinda had the same look ever since we started dating in 2023 except my hair got longer. I want to switch things up and try new styles and looks but I believe im afraid of change and still wanting his approval.
-I often question myself like if I cut my hair and he comes back will he like it? (he loves my hair)
- If I dye my hair will I leave a different impression on people (etc).
- Will I hate my new look?
Why am I changing myself to heal from a guy when im still trying to find who I am.
Last updated on:2026-07-09T22:31:12+05:30
Comments (5)
one tiny thing that had NOTHING to do with my ex every week. one class, one outfit, one new coffee shop. i stopped waiting to feel motivated first because that day never came for me.
when you picture him coming back, do you actually want HIM to like the new version of you, or are you scared you'll make a choice you can't take back?
so proud of you❤️
stop centering him in your 100 days self reinvention
Instead of asking yourself will he like your hair if he comes back ask yourself will I feel more confident in my new look if I cut my hair
Will I feel beautiful and more confident with myself if I make this drastic change
day 49 is HUGE ❤️ i remember staring at my own no contact counter every morning. somewhere around that point i realized i wasn't actually asking "who am i?" i was still asking "who would they want me to be?"