honestly I feel like I've never been genuinely desired by a woman. My whole teenage years and adult life have felt like one rejection after another. I know people always say to work on your personality but when someone isn't physically attracted to you in the first place it feels pointless. That's why I've ended up believing the blackpill mindset. My own experiences keep reinforcing it.
When I was 21 I finally got into a relationship after trying harder than I ever had before. We dated for almost a year but in the end she admitted she never actually loved me then blocked me. That completely crushed me. It feels like the same thing has happened over and over again and every time it takes another piece out of me.
After almost two years I decided to give dating another chance.
I started a new job and became close to a coworker who's a couple of years older than me. I really liked her and honestly thought there might be something between us. I did my best but I got rejected again. She told me we should just be friends because of the age gap but I don't believe that's the real reason. I think she just isn't attracted to me like every other woman I've ever liked.
People always say "it gets better" but it never has for me. Every time I let myself hope I end up heartbroken again. Right now I don't even want to try anymore. I don't want to keep putting myself through this.
The hardest part is that I still have to see her at work until she leaves. I spent days trying to get closer to her because I thought we could end up together and now every interaction just reminds me that she doesn't feel the same way.
I'm exhausted. I feel like I've been sad my entire life and I honestly can't imagine anything changing. It feels like I'll always be alone stuck in a job I don't enjoy trying to accept a future that I don't know how to make peace with.
Last updated on:2026-07-15T14:48:12+05:30
Comments (3)
i know how easy it is to fall into the blackpill when your own life seems to keep confirming it. i wasn't forcing myself to date again, it was stepping away until i wasn't measuring my worth by whether one woman wanted me or not.
dating always been the thing making you feel this way, or were you already feeling this exhausted and unhappy before this coworker came into your life?
i had one relationship where he admitted he was never really all in, and i swear that broke something in me for a long time. after enough rejection i started treating every "no" like proof there was something wrong with me too