Hi everyone,
I’m turning to the community because I’m going through a tough time and would really appreciate some outside perspectives on my situation.
The Context:
It was a 4-month relationship with a girl I met while traveling in her country. We spent time together in real life twice (3 weeks during each trip). The rest of the time was a long-distance relationship.
On top of that, she didn’t speak my language and her English was very basic, so we had to communicate a lot using translation apps. It took a lot of daily effort from both of us.
She broke up with me recently. She told me she didn't feel the same way about me since an argument we had, and that she was extremely tired/exhausted by the situation. Before we met, she had just come out of a 5-year relationship with her ex and was still thinking about him.
On my side, I love her very much. I understand her need for space, the emotional fatigue, and how hard distance is, but it’s still really painful to handle.
The Dynamic:
She is a very shy person with a lot of pride. I know that even if she misses me or regrets this later, her pride will likely stop her from making the first move or reaching out to me again.
Where I Stand Right Now:
For now, I am respecting her decision and her silence: no text messages, no reaching out. I know that pushing things would only make her pull away further. But given the distance, the language barrier, and what she said about her feelings, I’m a bit lost:
Could this drop in feelings just be caused by mental exhaustion (distance + constant translating + past baggage)?
How much time should I give it for the pressure to fully settle down?
Given her pride and the distance, is it worth trying a light check-in later on, or is it better to just let time do its thing?
Thanks in advance to anyone who takes the time to read and share their thoughts or experiences.
Last updated on:2026-07-27T21:02:12+05:30
Comments (4)
i kept trying to find the “right time” to reach out after my breakup, but giving space was the only thing that stopped me from making the hurt worse.
when she said she didn’t feel the same since the argument, did she explain what changed for her after that moment? was it the fight itself, or did it bring up all the stress she was already carrying?
She told me I was no longer her safe space. When I told her why I loved her, she asked me why I was saying it now when she didn't need it anymore, and that when she loved me, she felt like I didn't love her as much.
i was in a long distance relationship too, and the constant effort of trying to make it work started feeling heavier than the love sometimes. i remember feeling like i was losing someone because life got exhausting, not because i stopped caring.