Can we be honest? The hardest part is not the breakup, it is the fear that you will go back.
I'm not depressed, I'm just anxious. Anxious that at night when I'm bored, lonely or miss that one good night I might unblock him.
I still love him a little and that's what I hate. I hate relationships sometimes or whatever that was. But I know if I go back, I'll go back to the whole movie and it won't get better, he failed to change with all the chances I gave him so he won't now. The accusations, the anxiety, the having to beg, the birthdays and other special days forgotten.
So I'm protecting my peace now. I wrote a list of why I left. I tell myself "not today." I text my notes instead of him.
If you feel that fear too, it doesn't mean you failed. It means the habit is still unwinding. You are not alone.
What do you do when the urge to go back comes?
Last updated on:2026-08-23T06:31:12+05:30
Comments (8)
i used to text my ex whenever the urge got really strong, then delete the message before sending it. eventually i started writing exactly what i wanted to say in my notes instead, and honestly that little pause saved me more than once.
i really feel this, especially the “not today” part. when the urge hits you at night, what usually triggers it most, missing him specifically or missing having someone there?
It's definitely not him but I miss having someone
that weird fear of missing someone even when i knew going back would mean reliving the same pain. nights were the worst for me too, because loneliness can make a bad relationship feel like a good memory.
Yeah being lonely is the worst. And that wave always hits hard at night or during weekends/holidays .
Keep distracting yourself. do reminisce what you lacked or did. reflect on that.
not going to lie I’d do anything to get her back. I just don’t want to be hurt again and that’s the hardest part. I really miss her
I mean you seem like you love her and you are very thoughtful and considerate of her feeling. What was the problem ? Maybe there's something that you can change about yourself or something that is hurting her since you say you are willing to do anything unless she has moved on.