Why did i ignore the red flags? my three-year struggle with his lies

Author

i ruined my own mental and physical health trying to make excuses for a man’s lies for three years. what started as small gaslighting about him looking at other women turned into bigger betrayals secret friendships through text lies about pornography cheating with his baby mum and eventually finding out he had been living a double life with his ex when we first met.
i feel completely trapped in the aftermath of all of it. i’m isolated exhausted and carrying so much betrayal and hurt that i just needed to get it all out of my head.

Last updated on:2026-08-28T00:15:12+05:30

Comments (3)

joethetard
joethetard 3 wks ago

three years of being lied to is a LOT to carry, and i’m really sorry you’ve been left with all of that. i had to stop blaming myself for believing someone i loved, and start putting that energy into getting myself back, one tiny thing at a time.

odonien
odonien 3 wks ago

do you have even one person you trust enough to tell the whole story to, because i really hope you’re not carrying all of this completely alone?

dramaQueen
dramaQueen 3 wks ago

me too making excuses for someone because admitting the truth meant facing how much i’d already invested. when the lies kept getting bigger, i barely recognized myself anymore.