my ex was the first guy I genuinely saw a real future with. For three months we acted like a couple daily calls constant dates physical affection and deep care. But right before a hyped-up birthday surprise in October he panicked over work stress and dumped me saying he couldn't handle a relationship.
When I tried to establish boundaries and walk away he couldn't leave it alone. He kept texting claiming he dreamed about me and eventually reeled me back in by admitting he self-sabotaged. Now we are back in a confusing cycle where he acts like my boyfriend in person buys me lunch and sends me reminder songs but refuses to commit.
I'm terrified I'm just a temporary fix for his loneliness and his past relationship with a girl named Maya (who has a very similar name to mine) only adds to my anxiety. I care about him deeply but I'm exhausted by the back-and-forth. How do I stop letting him breadcrumb me when walking away feels so hard?
Last updated on:2026-10-29T11:20:12+05:30
Comments (5)
my ex would pull me close whenever he felt lonely, then act like i was asking for too much when i wanted something real. those little reminders and sweet moments kept me hoping, even when the uncertainty was eating me alive
when you ask for commitment, what does he actually say, does he give you a clear answer or just enough hope to keep you there?
University is the place to meet people! One thing I regretted is focusing on guys when I was younger. I should’ve focused on me while being open to dating casually a variety of people until one really synced together mutually. I spent a lot of time being sad over lame guys.
Personally, I believe in communication. If you feel that way then tell him how he's so confusing and he needs to set clear intentions and goals. If he can't handle stress and a relationship at the same time, he's not ready. Don't wait or try to fix someoene who's not prepared/matured enough for love.
he wants to feel loved and appreciated and doesn’t care for the consequences his attitude brings (which is making you hurt). I cannot say he doesn’t care about you but he obviously loves him more and is why he sticks around you the way he does. I understand where you come from because you clearly have feelings for him but you’re waiting for someone that doesn’t want the same as you, he has already shown you who he really is.