So I've been previously married for 10 years. Me and the ex have a son together. We separated when he was 6. A few years after our divorce I met a beautiful woman. I've never believed in love at first sight, but this was truly just that. Everything went smooth and she moved in with me.
At first my son loved her. She was a mother figure to him. About a year in, things gradually strarted to spiral downwards. There were red flags I overlooked. She slowly started to hate my son's mother, and also started getting jealous when I spent time with my son etc.
Two years in we got engaged, and she felt pregnant with our beautiful son, but then things dramatically changed. Long story short..... She started to treat my eldest son in unimaginable ways like blaming him when we had a fight. All of a sudden I couldn't have a 2 min conversation with my son, then all hell broke loose. It got to a point where she would physically hit me, spit at me and tell my things like I'm the worst dad an person she ever met.
We would barely talk with each other for more than a week. When things got better, it wouldn't last for more than 5 days before things get all sour again.
All our fights was about my son. I couldn't take it anymore, so I broke up with her to protect my son from all the emotional harm.
She then tried to keep our son away from me. Weeks went by not seeing my son, so I was forced to take legal action.
I fought a battle for nearly 2 years. My youngest son doesn't even know he has a brother because she doesn't want him to be a part of his brother's life.
So, now I see my son on Mon and Wed evenings while his mother is also there. Every second weekend I visit him, also with his mother's supervision.
We agreed that he will start to sleep over when he is a bit older.
So the point I'm trying to make is that I've been through hell with this woman. All the things she set me through are good enough reason to hate this woman, but my heart can't let go of her.
It's been three years. The both of us weren't in any relationship again. She says she will never be able to live someone as much as she loves me. I geel exactly the same way, but I also never want to put any of my sons through conditions like that again.
What's making things worse, are the fact that we still have sex, and we always take our son out together.
I've never asked for advice, but is it better to let go,or keep on hoping and working towards making things work between me and her?
Last updated on:2026-10-31T00:17:18+05:30
Comments (3)
Thanks for the advice. I appreciate it.
I am very sorry you went through all that drama. Have you both seen to a therapist, either alone or together? It sounds like there are a lot of emotions coming to the surface but there is a lot more going on in the deepest parts of your souls.
Hold on.. so you know she's been emotionally abusive to your sons, you're "worried" about their safety.. yet you continue to have sex with her?? Control your LUST for your children's sakeđź’€ Stop thinking with ur pen1s and start thinking rationally, you had a legal battle with her remember??
It's not about you and her, it's about you and your SONS. When children are involved, they are PRIORITY. especially as a parent it's your responsibility to put them first