Hey guys,
so my ex had broken up with me a little less than 2 months ago and 2 weeks after breaking up told me she was already flirting with someone else, I later heard they were sleeping together as well.
My ex however is the sister of a guy who used to be my best friend, I asked for his permission to date her telling him I caught feelings for her and he gave me his permission.
turned out during my relationship of 2 years he was constantly trying to sabotage it, telling my now ex that she should break up with me over the smallest disagreements.
funny thing is, his Girlfriend also broke up with him around the same time, they actually bought a house together and before I was dating his sister the 3 of us would go to parties, hang out a lot etc. She was basically just a good friend of mine and the only reason I didn't speak to her again was because my ex told me her brother kept advising her to break up with me.
now something in me tells me that maybe I could reach out to his ex since we've been done dirty by the same family and just you know have some fun.... or hang out, go to parties like old times.
he used to cheat on her all the time and I always thought she was gorgeous and a very nice girl, I dont know if its the right thing to do though and if she would even appreciate me reaching out. I sent her a follow request and I guess if she accepts I'll start a conversation with her.
I don't know if I'm doing something very stupid right now since obviously they still talk because they gotta sell their house. But I just want to fill this void and might not be thinking straight
Last updated on:2026-09-20T22:19:34+05:30
Comments (18)
Hey bro. whats been happening? Thought I'd check in on you.
Hey brother, I really appreciate it. I was actually thinking about you recently and checked your NC status, good job on the 30+ days man!
I been up and down, I actually broke no contact after almost a month and it turned out exactly like you'd expect. We had a good 2-3 days, she turned cold and then started cancelling on me again. I told her I couldn't do this anymore, she got upset and blamed me for the breakup and I told her I'm done with it.
It feels different this time tho, I can actually grasp the acceptance but I still get moments of weakness where my brain tells me all the good stuff we went through.
How about yourself, you doing good recently?
@FunkPop123 Honestly, the days only starting moving fast when I adopted a new identity consisting of self love, acceptance, and improvement. i have gone all in into my health and fitness, im speaking to multiple propsective girlfriends, and I can barely recognise this new version of me.
You have to break away bro. I get days of weakness too, but once you have a positive vision for your future, its so much easier to look forward and not fall back.
its her birthday in 3 days and im not going to reach out or message her. There is nothing for us to discuss. I wish her the best for the future but our destiny does not allign. I want you to be at the same point too.
Go all in on forging a new identity. Go all in on self love and self development, and you will look back and actually think to yourself the new version of you deserves a better, more loyal and co-operative girl by your side.
I believe in you. I was crying into my pillow only a few months ago, now I have so much joy for the future and my daily habits. My tips are
1) No Corn or fap 🌽. This is vital .
2) Eat clean whole foods
3) Lift atleast 3x a week
4) Atleast 9000 steps daily
5) Get shit loads of vitamin D, through a combination of sun and supplements. im taking 10,000 mg of vitamin D a day and feel incredible.
you got this homie💪
@Havingablast amazing to hear brother, I'm totally committed this time to never make another move towards her again.
I've been doing a lot more social activities and it seems to help, but some days are just horrible still for me. Even when I know that she's treated me horribly something still tells me sometimes that its just because she was traumatized before getting into a relationship with me.
I'm hoping to get to where you are soon, some days I barely feel bad but days like today for some reason are extremely exhausting mentally
heyy i saw ur nc 0 what happened
hey hope you doing well! I'm a *** idiot is what happened, she got in touch with me and I went over to see her and her family (because I'm actually an idiot)
and we actually had a fun day. She started texting me after that she wanted to spend some time together and after around a week she again turned cold when I actually asked her out for dinner, talking about how she doesn't know if she can do it and doesn't want to hurt me. She also tried to get me to help her with some random stuff after telling me that so I kinda feel like she was just using me ander after telling her that I can't do it because I still have feelings she told me that she'd done a lot for me when we were together went ghost on me.
I appreciate you checking in on me, I was just a moron for resetting my progress because I feel like shit again
@FunkPop123 ohh that iss baddd but at least now you know that sshe hasnt changed,Aboutt mee i am doing veryy good as y can see my no contact progresss i am really healing i can sayyy,So now i am in a stage with him that he has me blocked on tiktok (because my cousin told him to because i was watching his repostss) and HE followed me on my new Instagram account he likes my notes and stories but i think he does that to everyoneee And yeahg i think me and him are better than everr he alsoo waved at me one dayyy,We are NOT haters not loversss but Not strangers absolutely like okayy we haven't talk for almost a month 😅 butt i am really happy about my selff Andd i hopeee and I KNOWW uu will go back to where you wereee(i meann with the healing thing)Am thinking about other things to tell y but i camt think of anything elsee right noww.,andd i was been so busy withh my studies and with the entering of the season so i had no timee forr this app.See yaa💋
@GiggTu103 I'm happy to hear that its been improving for you! I was just stupid falling in the trap once again of her being warm, I met some girls at parties and few new hobbies I've started so my confidence has been growing again. I should just never break no contact again and hope that this time I dont fumble if she contacts me for whatever reason.
but actually tho, super happy for you I know how hard you had it the first initial weeks!
@FunkPop123 😅You definitely know more than anyone how hard it was for me
ah, your post didn't make it seem like having someone to talk to. if you genuinely would like to be friends with this person, I would probably wait until the dust settles on the break up. always keep it classy is my motto.
i'd give it a little time before starting something new with her. when i was fresh out of my breakup, i kept chasing distractions and they never lasted because i was still hurting underneath.
do you think you'd still want to message her if your ex and her brother weren't part of the picture, or does it mostly feel like you're trying to escape how empty everything feels right now
I would, because it was just fun hanging out with her and we have very similar interests. The only reason I haven't reached out yet is because it feels weird to get with both his sister and his ex which he is still not over, but I feel conflicted because he tried to break me and my ex up plenty of times
after my ex moved on so fast, i would've grabbed onto ANY connection that made me feel less alone. just make sure you're reaching out because you genuinely miss her as a friend, not because you're trying to fill the hole your ex left.
you have the wrong intentions. if you saw this as an opportunity for revenge at first then yea its not a great idea at all. would you want anything that sparks to be built off revenge?
not revenge, I would just do this for me
Yeah probably not a good idea.
hey, thank you for your response!
could you care to elaborate? I'm not looking for anything specific with her or anything serious, she was just a good friend of mine and we're in similar situations.
I would just love to have someone to talk to tbh, and I know her story and she knows mine already