So my ex broke up with me about 6 weeks ago. I was about to move to his home country, had quit my job, my apartment and was really looking forward to it.
He called when he was with a friend in Spain, told me he didn't want kids and that was it. I haven't heard anything from him. We did couples counseling, because he wanted to, the counselor kept me kind of hoping to at least talk again for a good month. I had another session with him the other day, where he basically dropped me the same way my ex did. Just told me I should move on. In the session before he told me, that I created too much pressure concerning my wish for kids.
I know that it's over. It hurts really bad, I just send the engagement ring back. And now I keep finding myself contacting mutual friends to understand what went wrong. Because we used to be able to talk about our problems.
Has someone gone through something similar? When will it get easier? and when will I stop hoping that there will be a chance in the future?
Last updated on:2026-07-20T21:08:12+05:30
Comments (8)
i kept searching for answers after my breakup too, asking friends what happened because my brain couldn’t accept how someone i loved could just disappear.
hen you reach out to mutual friends, are you hoping to understand his reasons more, or are you hoping someone will tell you there’s still a chance?
tbh that there is a chance. That he regrets his choice..but he doesn't...
7 years and an engagement ending like that would break anyone. i remember packing up my whole life for someone who left before i got there, and the hardest part was accepting that i was grieving the future i had already pictured
that sounds though. I am very sorry for you. I am grieving a really nice future. at least the one I made up in my head. Does it get easier?
He's been distant for the past months. And I always had this feeling like something was up. I asked him and I never got a proper answer.
We haven't had contact, but I do miss him so much. And I still hope that there is a chance, which is stupid, I know..
A good counsellor is not supposed to push us into guilt and blame spirals. I’m glad you don’t have to see him anymore, he wasn’t right for you. You deserve someone who understands what you are dealing with, and I hope you find someone who is a better match for you therapeutically as you shouldn’t have to process your heartbreak alone.
That sounds heartbreaking. But while it must be difficult sorting out all your life again, at least you know now before you moved. Imagine getting there and then him dropping this on you. Sounds like it all overwhelmed him, but if he didn't want children he should have communicated that, given how important it is to you.