so it wasn't a boyfriend but a situationship, we couldn't date cuz i'm leaving to England. i didn't mind long distance but he did. turn out it was an excuse.
i knew he wasn't in love yet but i trusted him, i thought he would be perfect, and he was. respected me, took care of me, after care, etc etc, perfect. and in a way i don't regret doing it with him
but when he stopped it, he told me "you are attached which isn't m'y case"
and then i realised. i knew i was giving my first time to a guy who didn't love me, but more than that, i gave it to someone who wasn't even attached to me.
and it makes me so sick.
cuz i really thought only future long distance was keeping us from dating. but no, he just didn't wanted me.
i feel so nauseous.
Last updated on:2026-07-26T01:01:05+05:30
Comments (7)
i didn't make a mistake by caring deeply. i chose someone based on what they showed me, and their feelings changing didn't erase the care i gave.
that's really sweet
did he ever actually talk about a future with you, or did you have to fill in the blanks because the distance seemed like the only thing standing in the way? i got caught in that trap once too.
he talked about future :( about me moving with him once my exchange year is done, us living in thailands, us going places and everything...
i gave my first time to someone who kept saying "maybe later," and i built a whole future around those words. finding out they never felt what i thought they did made me feel physically sick too.
how are you now feeling ? did you heal ?
i am nothing to him but he will always be my first time