I broke up because it was too toxic and unhealthy. I suffered to much with him bc he was never happy for me, really insicure and frustrated ,he didn't like that 1 had a life outside of him able to make me happy so he was really controlling and made me feel guilty for not staying only with him. Basically because he was sad all the time ...but he alway refused to go out of his room ,stay with friends, or do anything anyway.... he would just play games all day. We were LDR ,i called him everyday for hours and did everything i could to make him feel special...from words of reassurance, sacrificed time to study to stay with him, planned gifts, write to him all the time He said he preferred when I was insecure sa I could only be with him because i didn't have many friends and was to shy to start sports. He doesn't understand that if i like to dress cute its for myself,not no be seen by someone else, he had like FOMO .fear that someone could see me that wasn't him. 1 dont drink i dont smoke i dont go clubbing anyway. He says I don't make him feel special enough. But i tried everything i swear. I miss him so much,he was the only person I felt was my safe space and comfortable, I miss his hugs, his voice ,and his gentleness when he wasn't passive aggressive or made me feel bad. I miss the good times with him. I know I had to do the right thing but it hurts. Now he's angry and doesn't want to hear from me anymore. I was the only person allowed in his shell and now he's hurt and I feel guilty for choosing myself, but I had no other choice, I forgave him a lot of times. My friends say that I should not be responsible for what he feels right now ,and that he was trying to stop me from doing anything, and I should grieve and heal in peace. But it hurts so much. I broke no contact last niaht in tears and he he got mad .said I should be responsable of my choice and let him ao ,bc it hurts to him too and I can't act like I'm his girlfriend anymore.I miss him sm
Last updated on:2026-09-14T17:24:54+05:30
Comments (5)
do you miss the relationship you actually had, or the version of him who made you feel safe before all the controlling and guilt started?
I miss definitely the second one. he always had this hurtful way of doing things if i have to be honest, but when we had the opportunity to see each other in person I felt amazing , he was perfect and acted perfectly fine ... probably because I was always with him so he had me close. but even at my own party he refused to socialize in any way
i cried and broke no contact too, especially when the guilt got loud.
loving someone who felt like my safe place while also feeling smaller and smaller inside the relationship. i remember missing the gentle version of my ex so badly that i started questioning whether leaving was really right, even though i knew how much the relationship was hurting me.
yeah I know this feeling. takes a lot of courage to step away but I had to ask myself, is this realty the thing i want for my future?if I met this person right now, would I still fall in love if they treat me like this? wich is sad, because I still love them