the break up was messy and sudden, the true person she was came out after it all, the stuff she did, said, and lied about to me and others in attempt to manipulate them and me, is vile. lucky the people who are around both of us saw what she was doing and took my side, I did not turn them against her, it was her behaviour that did so. and that's what it is, she thinks the way she acts is cool and everyone will praise her for it, the only people who do are her awful friend group who got her into smoking drinking and encouraged her to hook up two days after the break up. and she was laughing about it saying how bad she was. but I still care for her, because I still love her, despite me knowing it's not reciprocated. she also said to a mutual that she has been lonely ever since, that no one asks her out or messages her, and I know that's because of her and her decisions, but I still feel sympathy for her, but I don't know if I should, she knew the mess I was in after it all and still did all those things and said everything and lied. but I'm not like her, I want the best for people I care about. even when we were together I now know she didn't want the best for me. I have been told stuff she said about me while we were together. she said she had me round her finger, she made fun of the way dress, the way I keep my room, the way I live my life, and that hurts so much, I have never and still will never say anything like that about her. I think I'm at the point where I know I don't want her back and I hate that version of her, but I still care for and miss the version that loved me and it's so so confusing, I just don't know what to do to move forward.
Last updated on:2026-06-24T03:50:26+05:30
Comments (6)
the part that stands out to me is that you don't want her back, you want the version of her that loved you. when i finally separated those two people in my mind, things started making a lot more sense.
I've been going through the motions, and that is the conclusion I have come to, I find it helps, but by not thinking of them as one, I'm finding it hard to get over the one that loved me
i was in love with someone who turned into a completely different person after the breakup too. finding out what he said about me behind my back hurt more than the breakup itself.
it really does, I think it makes it harder, because when processing Ur mind has to deal with two different persons, and I find myself treating her as such, I think of the version of her when we were together differently than I do the one after the break up. I don't know if I'm right for doing that, or if it would make it easier to move on of I think of them as one
when you think about the version of her you miss, is that version based on how she treated you consistently, or on a handful of moments that felt really good before everything fell apart?
I truly did enjoy every moment with her, but now I look back on it, it was because she knew how I ticked, how to make me happy, and she used it. but I do think there was a time where she truly loved me, and that's the version I miss, I miss the person that I was consistently showing me the love I was showing them, but now I have taken the rose tinted glasses off, I see it was a very different situation