I'm so proud of myself. I'm not hard core no contact anymore, but I am holding strong to very low contact and that feels good.
Also, I no longer want my ex back! My life is so much better than it was with her and the friend group she's in that i helped introduce her to.
My friends now actually show up for me! And I'm dating someone who will take pleasure in doing things it wouldn’t normally do simply because it enjoys getting to know me better. It takes me out for moonlight swims in the river. We dance and sing along to music in the car. It is kind and understanding and it makes it clear that it wants to know me deeply.
Last updated on:2026-08-11T23:35:02+05:30
Comments (13)
111 Days is something to be so proud of 🎁
thank you!
That's amazing! That gives me hope! Yeah for sure. Smart. Take it slow. Your heart is on the line. You only get one in this lifetime lol
so true! I am learning! it's hard but I think I'm getting there
the biggest shift for me was noticing how different it feels when people actually SHOW UP.
same! I am neurodivergent and so have a lot of experiences of feeling like I'm never enough and have to over extend in order to get the lot that i need, but it turns out there are other neurodivergent who are kind and understand and willing to work with me in the ways I need
Thanks for sharing and giving us hope!
i didn’t want my ex back anymore, and that feeling was almost as shocking as the breakup itself. suddenly i could see how much smaller my life had gotten around them.
there was a moment before we broke up that I had that realization really strong... realizing that I was living for her more than myself. It took a long time before I actually let her go though. Over a year... for a while still holding on and trying to make it work and then trying to hold on to our mutual friends. When I committed to no contact that's when things really started to change. I still have a long way to go towards prioritizing myself but damn... it's amazing how hard I held on to something that was causing me so much pain and anxiety
this made me smile so hard. i’m curious, when you look at this new relationship, what feels most different to you?
Mmmm. That's a good question. I feel like my ex was super conflicte avoidant to the point where it felt manipulative because she would omitte having important conversations if they were to difficult. Yet even though she was conflict avoidant she also said "no" a lot. To the point that I often felt discouraged from suggesting things.
The girl I'm seeing now has already been really proactive about communicating and does not seem to be afraid of conflict. Yet she is so ready to say yes to things as well as suggesting things herself.
That's helpful to think about. Thank you 😊
That's so awesome! You should be proud. You did the work and earned good karma with a new better partner :)
Thank you! Yeah. I'm taking things slow and trying really hard to still focus on me and not be consumed by the exciting new relationship energy. It's still a work in progress, but starting to believe that I have the power to intentionally shape the kinds of relationships i want really shifted things for me.