I miss her.

Author

Despite being gay, in an orthodox family, I really did everything to be with her. and I ended up being alone, again. I just wanted love, a reciprocation. Yet, she had me in square zero, again. It's hard to let go, I am blocked everywhere, and she made me feel like I am a pathetic person, who's too desperate to contact her. Maybe, it's over. I was prolly being delusional when I thought it could work. I am in severe pain, though I am on anti-depressants and anti-psychotics. I cry everyday, I get headaches, I miss her.

I loved her more than me.
Or, maybe I still do.

She consumes me. It's unhealthy. But, I am not sure if I am seeing enough.

Last updated on:2025-11-21T22:48:55+05:30

Comments (18)

ZVova
ZVova 6 mths ago

when you think about her… do you miss her, or do you miss how you felt when things were good? sometimes that difference says a lot.

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

I just miss her. She has been someone I really fell for. But yeah. I do miss her when things were pretty and stuff. But I miss her more. Just her presence everyday, would make more of a difference. Reassurance and all the cutesy stuff aside, I miss her. Just a plain emotionless version of her.

Kiyara
Kiyara 6 mths ago

i’m bisexual and i grew up in a super strict family too. i bent myself in every direction just to make a relationship work with a girl who barely met me halfway. when she blocked me everywhere, i swear it felt like my whole body was buzzing with panic. the part where you said she made you feel pathetic… yeah, i’ve had someone talk to me like that. turns your love into shame. you’re not delusional. you’re heartbroken.

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

I am in pain. I really love this girl.

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

@ByteRay708 She made me feel the worst. And the horrible thing is I am hoping she comes back.

BraveNew475
BraveNew475 6 mths ago

@ByteRay708 You will be okay ♥️

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 6 mths ago

I am so sorry about this...what lead to the break up?

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

I was anxious, she drift apart. Not a single reassurance, so I panicked, I tried contacting her. And bam! she ghosts me. No break up. Just ghosted. The timer in the app says 1 day since no-contact. But I haven't talked to her for two weeks.

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 6 mths ago

@ByteRay708 I am so sorry that you feel so alone. I am sure you will cope up with this

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

@ChillPals137 It's confusing. She is tryna contact me. But I am conflicted.

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 6 mths ago

@ByteRay708 just communicate with her

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

@ChillPals137 She wants me back. Kinda. Now, I am severely conflicted.

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 6 mths ago

@ByteRay708 have a conversation with her and get back together

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

@ChillPals137 Are you sure that's a good idea? She is studying medicine, busy all the time. So, I gotta be less anxious and kinda overthink less and call less. Am I capable of that?

ChillPals137
ChillPals137 6 mths ago

@ByteRay708 you are.... absolutely

BraveNew475
BraveNew475 6 mths ago

@ByteRay708 Don't go back. No one can be busy for someone they love. they'll be busy but they'll communicate, they won't let you overthink. Choose yourself

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

@ChillPals137 I am trying to give it a shot. Because, maybe if I am more mature this time around. Maybe, just maybe, things might be fine. Sorry for the late replies, the notification isn't pinging, and I was driving.

ByteRay708
ByteRay708 6 mths ago

@BraveNew475 I chose myself, and she is making time for me too, in her messed up schedule. Maybe, I should have a more better outlook on the relationship, then being completely invested?