after three years of having a beautiful relationship he broke up with me out of the blue last week. sure we had been drifting apart due to lifestyle incompatibility but just minutes before he ended it we were cuddling and planning our weekend. i was in shock and felt kind of numb at first but the grief is starting to get worse now. he texted the day after and said he feels he didn’t handle it well (i agree) and wants to talk things through. i think no contact is the way to go but in a moment of weakness yesterday i decided to offer to meet. then all of a sudden he can’t make the time for me anymore, even though he wanted to talk. i feel so embarrassed and that rejection hurt. since then ive been feeling worse so i decided to go no contact now (which we already almost were except those texts). i don’t want to but i know it will feel better. but what do i do if he asks to meet and talk again? i do want answers but i know at the end of the day it won’t change the outcome.
Last updated on:2026-05-25T06:19:12+05:30
Comments (10)
one minute you’re cuddling and talking about weekend plans, next minute your whole life gets ripped open. my ex also wanted to “talk things through” after blindsiding me, then suddenly got distant when i agreed. that second rejection HURT more than the breakup itself honestly.
i think you already know the answer deep down. i kept chasing “closure” too and every conversation just reopened the wound because i secretly hoped they’d change their mind.
do you feel like you actually want answers, or do you think part of you is hoping the conversation would bring back the version of him from before the breakup?
Call him and ask him about his plan of meeting you. Decide on what he says.Sometime we all need a closure.And once u get it never turn ur back
this happened to me too, we spent the day cuddling and watching TV and that night he dropped me home and ended it... I can imagine how you feel because I've felt it too... stay strong, you meet on YOUR own terms if you feel ready, not on his.
thank you, that’s my plan too. it’s so weird being blindsided like that, it’s like why didn’t you tell me how you were feeling until it was too late.
@GlimmerFlick719 quite literally!!! They totally gaslighted us and were cowards for not saying how they truly felt. the crazy thing is, we were happy for the most part... I don't know what changed for him...people around me said he wasn't ready to commit or got scared about the fact that I'd always be the strong one in the relationship...
give it some time. my recommendation would be a week to max 30 days.
hold the no contact. be the stronger one in the relationship who can control their feelings. you will find him chasing you if he really loves and cares and wants to spend time with you.
he does not value you. why you try to value him? Just give same treatment.