I’m hurting again to be truthful. I never distracted myself so for the past 40+ days of no contact I’ve felt every inch of it. It’s not that I don’t know why she left and we didn’t work but I wonder why we went from us vs the world to her building it with a new dude and I’m sitting in my room everyday facing insecurity, accountability and acceptance. Why do I have to be the one that has to better himself when she gets off scott free and in the arms of another? I’m in so much pain again and honestly I don’t think I can put my facts over feelings this time. It hurts that I haven’t seen and talked to her in months. She just disappeared one day. I remember the day it happened and our last conversation and it’s like I’m there again and it’s overwhelming. I thought I was healing and moving forward but I don’t feel like it anymore. I don’t even think she thinks of me anymore. She left me in the past like she said and she stood on her word. I’m heartbroken again but unlike everyone else I’m blocked so I can’t break no contact even if I wanted to. Maybe one day I’ll be able to look back at this and laugh.
Last updated on:2026-07-30T15:41:24+05:30
Comments (5)
As cliche as the saying goes. One day at a time. Im sorry you are still feeling so much pain, but remember you still win if you are putting in the work to better yourself. She doesnt get off Scott free, there will come a day when she realises she's lost you.
I promise dear friend, in time the days will get easier
healing never stayed in a straight line. i'd have days where i felt strong, then days where i was right back at the beginning, but those bad days didn't erase the progress i'd already made.
when you say she just disappeared, was there any kind of goodbye at all, or did everything end that suddenly?
I think we are fed this narrative that after 30 days we will feel better, but i think that's unrealistic. Maybe it is time to distract yourself. To do fun things you enjoy, to try something brand new, to make a new friendship. Its great to feel all the feels but you also need some relief. what is something you have always wanted to try or get back into that you have been putting off?
hitting that point around day 40 too, where i thought i was finally okay and then one random day it all crashed back over me. i hated that they got to move on while i was stuck rebuilding myself.