So when I was in a relationship with this guy I made a prank. it was a ldr so at first I thought the prank would be funny since we both trusted each other and he knows I'm not a cheater. apparently to him it came off that I was cheating. we argued and then he broke up with me. I begged for him over and over and he held that prank over my head saying things he didn't mean or I never thought he'd say. eventually we decided to talk it through and stick to being friends. we'd talk, have online dates and he'd still say "I miss you" or "I love you" in between but I won't say it back because I know it won't be healthy. my problem is that we both said we'll strive to be better and then be together and he said he'd like to know my updates and vice versa, but he'd plan trips with his "friends" and wouldn't tell me until last minute. recently I found out he'll be going out with his friend along with one of their girlfriend and some other friends both male and female. I'm traumatized from my past relationships because I've been cheated on for the dumbest reason (like not sending nudes or not being able to call at night cause I have strict parents), I was insulted and bullied also. so when this was said to me last minute I felt off. he kept going on and on about what they'll do etc. I was a bit jealous tho but I can't show him that, why? because whenever I say anything that makes me jealous or suspicious of him he'd say "but I never gave you a reason to not trust me but you did" and I understood but I just wish I could tell him how I feel without actually being scared to do so because he'd always hold that one prank over my head. I know I'm wrong for it and I know an apology won't change it. please help
Last updated on:2025-09-06T00:45:05+05:30
Comments (5)
Update: so he had shared his email with me to show me something in his email however his contacts got sync to my phone and it was a bunch of females, some even having just a bra on as their pfp. I even saw a recent search with him translating something in Spanish ("are you single baby") and guess what? few of the females spoke Spanish
it feels like the prank is the thing he leans on whenever he wants the upper hand. you end up filtering yourself because of it. i used to live like that too, always holding back just so i wouldn’t trigger another lecture.
being scared to say when i felt jealous because i knew it would turn into him twisting my words. i’d sit on my feelings until they burned me out. i get what you mean about wanting to share but being scared it’ll be used against you.
i hate how they grab one mistake and beat you with it forever. i had an ex who kept throwing one fight back in my face for months like he finally found a weapon and wouldn’t drop it. it made me feel like i was always on trial.
I am not really sure if I understood it correctly, but to me it seems that you're currently not in a relationship with this guy and you agreed on being friends, right?
And unfortunately I think that this is the root of the problem. It's not healthy to agree on friendship when you have feelings for this person, because you will end up getting hurt at some point... Since you're just friends he basically doesn't owe you any explanations regarding where he is going and who he is with. Jealousy also shouldn't be playing a role in a friendship... You are clearly hurting and I am so sorry for that. But I don't think that you're doing yourself a favor by staying in this situation. My advice to you is to learn about your own boundaries and needs. Step back for a while and reflect on what you truly want and need. It doesn't help that he is holding the prank against you either. I think distance could help reducing the tension between you two.