i’ve been in a relationship for almost three years and it’s just been getting worse. we keep having the same fights nothing ever changes and we’re completely different people who can’t seem to agree on anything. whenever i try to talk about what’s bothering me he takes it like i’m attacking him.
he’s always “too tired” to have real conversations but somehow has energy when it comes to anything physical. he doesn’t try to understand what i like and during arguments he yells at me even when i ask him not to. i’ve wanted to leave for a while but every time i bring it up he changes just enough to make me stay then falls right back into the same patterns.
recently an old boyfriend from childhood who was also my best friend reached out on instagram. we started catching up and when we talked about relationships it felt like i was hearing my own story. we have so much in common unlike what i have now. even something as simple as talking to him made me feel seen and happy again.
it made me realize how much i’ve been missing. i want conversations and connection like that in my relationship. so i’ve decided i’m going to end things no matter what because i don’t want to keep feeling like this.
i do feel guilty though. part of me thinks that if we were both single someday maybe something could happen between me and him slowly and in a healthy way. nothing inappropriate has happened but i still feel bad for even thinking it.
Last updated on:2026-04-28T18:18:03+05:30
Comments (3)
you’d still want to leave if that old friend hadn’t come back, or did he just help you finally see what was already missing
i stayed in something like that for years, same fights, same “i’ll change” loop, and the second i talked to someone who actually listened i realized how empty i’d been feeling the whole time. that guilt is real but so is that clarity
Man reconnecting with someone who actually gets you can be a real wake up call about what youve been missing. You're not betraying anyone by realizing your current relationship isnt working - the fact that you've been wanting to break up for a while says everything