my partner and i have been together for over two years and last night he told me something that’s been bothering me. he said that a couple weeks ago he saw a post from his ex on facebook they broke up three years ago but are still friends there even though they don’t talk. the post was her showing her newborn baby with her current partner and he admitted he went and checked her profile.
i asked him why they’re still connected on facebook and he said they ended on good terms. then i asked why he felt the need to look into her profile and he said he just wanted to see if the baby was actually hers or maybe a sibling.
i reminded him that we’ve talked about leaving the past in the past and focusing on what we have now. i asked him calmly what made him want to keep up with moments like that in her life but instead of answering he said i was being overdramatic.
Last updated on:2026-04-28T02:00:06+05:30
Comments (5)
it’s really about him checking her profile, or more about how he made you feel when you tried to talk about it?
i’ve been in something similar, where my partner brushed off something that clearly didn’t sit right with me. that “you’re overdramatic” line stung more than the actual situation, made me feel small and kinda dismissed.
You did nothing wrong, but a baby for an ex is something to look at. Can be happy for her, can be a silent closure he needed, or can be simply a bittersweet feeling of "this baby is what I promised once, but not mine".
I'm very loyal and expect the same.
You did nothing wrong and no you are not over-dramatic… what he did is completely wrong.. its shows that somewhere he still have some feelings left for his ex, otherwise why would you even do it when you are in a new relationship…
In all honesty, I can't imagine that there's anything wrong with checking how someone from your past is doing.
Wouldn't you rather give him some freedom, let him appreciate the friendships and relationships throughout his life?
You should encourage him to be open about this kind of thing with you, I know it might make you uncomfortable, but it's healthy! Relationships can change, fade, disappear; remaining friends or acquaintances is normal.
Him simply knowing how someone is doing is NOT going to put your relationship at risk. Questioning and restricting his actions just creates tension and distrust, and THAT hurts both of you.
It's a huge milestone in her life, you should be happy for her! She has a family! Appreciate the people that have been a good part of his life.