This was the healthiest relationship i've ever been in, & i was her first of many things. First time i spent holidays & met family with someone. She broke up with me a week before my birthday. i thought it was just a break at first, so i messaged her for clarity, turns out nope, it was a breakup. It was low contact for the moment & i asked for her to send me something of mine back for the moment. She says it's bc of life & school stress. But i feel like that can't be it. There's gotta be more to it. My anxious attachment went wild and messaged her April 22, telling her my feelings & just wanting to know if we are okay. Even as friends, i just wanted to know, i got met with being blocked on everything. That made everything 10 times worse. & then i got my package, more things than i expected, including 2 of my tshirts, they smelled like her. & a wooden ring i carved and just gave to her for valentine's day.
Everything reminds me of her. All the hobbies i love. Everything. We were so good with communication, i don't understand how it got to this. Our first conflict and it ended in a breakup, & there's nothing wrong with me or her. It just, is. & that hurts the most. In the beginning she said she hates being ghosted & is very direct & blunt. How can she do something she dislikes herself? What was this shift..There's gotta be something wrong. Any advice, comfort & words of encouragement is appreciated
Last updated on:2026-05-05T17:50:06+05:30
Comments (7)
you’re holding on more to who she was in the beginning, or who she showed you at the end when she left like this
i know your brain wants answers, mine did too. but i had to accept that sometimes people shut down and leave without explaining, and chasing clarity only made me feel worse.
my anxious attachment has ruined more than one relationship. I’m trying to commit to learning how to manage that before getting into another relationship and that is my focus while trying to heal
i had something like that too, first real healthy love and then it just… ended out of nowhere. getting their stuff back with their scent on it messed me up for weeks, i couldn’t escape it
I feel you… I’m going through something very similar right now.I also kept thinking there has to be more to it, like there should be a reason or something to understand. But I’m slowly realizing sometimes… there’s no clear answer, and that’s the hardest part.Getting blocked really hurts. It makes you question everything.But I don’t think you did anything wrong. Wanting clarity, reaching out, caring… that just shows how genuine you are.I’m still struggling too, but I’m trying to accept that their actions already say a lot.It’s really hard… but you’re not alone in this.
i’m trying my best to be okay with the unknown. Yeah the old actions speak louder than words saying. i’m one of those people who give romantic/healing advice to friends & never take my own advice. Being so self aware of it all makes it worse.
@LavLemon1234 I get that… I feel the same sometimes.