Background: Married 28 years, seperated for 7, husband cheated and moved his mistress in with 2 of my children while I was away at an inpatient treatment program. I was getting on with my life and after 3 years seperated it didn't even bother me to be around the mistress because I looked at her and her life, who she is and she had no affect on me. Then I made the mistake of allowing him back into my life and im back at square one and of course when I have been sleeping with him, I don't want to be anywhere near her and I am struggling on distancing myself from my husband and how to stop sleeping with him. Sometimes I wonder if I did allow her to come back around if it would help me move on because I definitely wouldn't sleep with him anymore and maybe it would help me forgive and stop living in the past, I am desperate and willing to do whatever it takes to move on and break this hell cycle that I have got myself in. I am just trying to think of what I can do because im tired of feeling like crap, I am tired of being sad all the time and I am tired of feeling stuck. I am tired of wanting my old life back when I know it would never work out for me and my husband because I couldn't ever trust him again. idk anyone have any advice?
Last updated on:2026-06-22T00:43:11+05:30
Comments (3)
when you imagine a year from now, which feels more peaceful to you: being completely detached from both of them, or still trying to find a way to make the three of you coexist somehow?
i went back to an ex who had already broken my trust, and every time we got close again it ripped open wounds that had started to heal. i kept thinking one more chance would bring peace, but it mostly kept me stuck.
what i would say is that you have had the strength to move on once before, so you know you can do it again. Your husband will continue to treat you this way if you continue to allow it. sounds messy. But anything that makes you feel crappy instead of fantastic just isn't worth it.