i've been with my girlfriend for 6 months but the lying started around 2 months into the relationship and has continued most recently just a few days ago.
the hard part is that i genuinely love her. i've never felt this strongly about anyone before and she says the same about me. we connect incredibly well and outside of the dishonesty i honestly saw her as someone i could build a future with.
this all started when we were talking about relationship dealbreakers. she asked if i could date someone who had done sex work in the past. i told her i had no issue with certain things but being a former stripper would be a dealbreaker for me personally.
after that conversation her story kept changing. first she said she had only managed an OF account for a friend. then she admitted to posting bikini photos. later she admitted to posting nudes. each new piece of information only came out after previous statements stopped adding up.
eventually i looked online and found old content including cam videos an OF profile and other material that revealed much more than she had told me. when i confronted her she denied most of it until i showed her the evidence. only then did she admit the truth.
we had a long conversation afterward. i told her i wasn't judging her for her past. what hurt was that she took away my ability to make an informed decision by repeatedly lying about it. i told her that if there were any other major things she hadn't been honest about now was the time to tell me. she said there wasn't.
months later i started noticing inconsistencies about her old "bottle girl" job. after asking directly several times she finally admitted she had actually been stripping during that period including when we first met. she said she hid it because she was ashamed and afraid of being judged.
i understand being embarrassed by your past. i genuinely do. but what i'm struggling with is the fact that i gave her multiple chances to be honest explained how important honesty was to me and even told her that another lie would likely end the relationship.
now i'm stuck.
i love her deeply but i don't know if i trust her anymore. every lie has been about her past but the pattern of dishonesty is what worries me. she knew how important honesty was to me and still chose to hide things until she was confronted.
has anyone been through something similar? were you able to rebuild trust after repeated lies or did you eventually realize the trust was gone?
Last updated on:2026-06-04T22:31:23+05:30
Comments (5)
it’s time to leave her
i can see why you're torn. i dated someone who kept telling the truth in tiny pieces, and after a while i wasn't upset about the original thing anymore, i was exhausted from constantly finding out there was MORE
what stood out to me is that you already gave her multiple chances to come clean.
if you had learned all of this from her on day one instead of having to uncover it yourself over months, do you think you'd still want a future with her? or is the repeated lying the part that's become impossible to get past?
I'm sorry to hear you're going through this, I was also lied to and cheated on 6 months into my now 2 year relationship. things never got better. he lied day after day and I always find out after, he had a whole baby on me and lied how how he hated the girl when he was actively still sleeping with her. that broke my heart, I could feel my bones physically trembling, he shocked my whole nervous system. he killed me that day but he let me live. it never got any better until he just stop talking to me. he said he won't be able to trust me because even though I said I forgave him, he feels like one day I'll take revenge and hurt him
he's treated me like garbage 89% of the time and the remaining he'd be nice to me. the worse part about it is that I genuinely love him with all my soul.
but I deserve better, and so do you. we don't deserve to be lied to and taken for granted. I am so sorry you're going through this. he broke what little trust I had left. may you find the peace you need to at least learn to trust again