it's been about a year since my breakup now. she was my first real love the person i thought was everything i'd ever wanted. she ended things because she wanted to see other people and it completely shattered me.
the first few months were brutal. i cried almost every day for 4 to 6 months and threw myself into random rebound dates that never lasted more than a couple of months. i was just trying to fill the hole she left.
looking back now a lot has changed. i landed a new job that i genuinely love. i've lost 22kg i go to the gym almost every day and i run regularly too. i've completely changed my style and even found my way back to my gothic side. i spent a lot of time learning about attachment styles and worked hard on my anxious attachment. these days i feel mostly healed and i'm fully over her. she was beautiful but she wasn't the right person for me.
i've also reconnected with old friends traveled more and built a life that actually feels good again.
now i'm starting to feel curious about dating but i'm not sure if i'm ready. part of me worries it'll take forever to find someone who's genuinely compatible and another part of me dreads running into my ex on the dating apps.
for those who've been through this how did you know you were ready to start dating again?
Last updated on:2026-08-05T21:21:11+05:30
Comments (4)
this made me smile because you've rebuilt so much after getting your heart broken. for me, i knew i was ready when the idea of someone saying "no thanks" didn't feel like the end of the world anymore. i could walk away disappointed, but still okay.
when you picture dating again, are you excited about getting to know someone new, or are you mostly anxious about running into your ex and reopening old wounds
hitting that point where i wasn't crying anymore and my life finally felt like MINE again. i started dating after that, and the difference was i wasn't looking for someone to fill a hole, i was just curious to meet people.
It's always hard to find the matching one dear friend, but it's not impossible. Good things really take time and I think it's mentally unhealthy to wait for someone who's already good without u.