its been day 9 since he broke up with me, and i dont believe how quickly i have improved.. i went no contact with him and he is the one who has reached out to me three times.. tge 1st two times i spoke alot.. lengthy paragraphs.. and he is an avoidant.. but this time my response was different .. he asked you ok.. i said yes.. he said good and thats it i didnt go further asking him how he is etc.. and im at peace.. because i have observed my pattern i would talk too much and not get a response i expect and then the anxiety increases that makes me message him more and go in a complete spiral...
i am so proud of myslef, i hope i only get better from now on!
Last updated on:2026-08-13T15:16:06+05:30
Comments (6)
i'd send one message, wait for the reply, get anxious when it wasn't what i wanted, then send another. being able to stop yourself mid-pattern like that is HUGE
that was the key.. something i understood now that i dont need to send him any messages at all its like you touching a sleeping snake that will wake up and bite you.. so to stay sane dont touch the snake
i'm really proud of you too. i learned that sometimes the biggest win is sending less, expecting less, and realizing i can still have a peaceful day afterward.
you noticed yourself wanting to ask how he was, did you feel the urge and choose not to, or did the urge barely come this time?
when he asked me you ok.. my usual response after telling i am ok would be asking about him.. but i knew he would say i am fine and that would have hurt me or made me anxious.. so this time i didnt ask.. because wheather i ask or i dont he wont melt for me ive done way bigger things for him and that didnt matter so this small thing wont matter too
wow im proud of u too