One of the things this breakup has made me realize is that the moments you share with someone you love can feel so ordinary while you’re living them, even though they’re actually incredibly precious.
I don’t regret the boundaries I set. If I didn’t want to hug someone on some days, I didn’t. If I didn’t want to be touched, I didn’t let him. Sometimes even being touched by someone I loved could irritate me. Sometimes he wanted to hug me and I pulled away. Sometimes he kissed my face and I would say, “Okay, enough,” and move away. I felt what I felt in those moments, and I don’t blame myself for that.
But now I realize something: I lived as if I would never lose these things.
Having the person you love hold your hand while walking beside you, wanting to hug you, kissing you, simply sitting next to you… Back then, these things were such a natural part of my life that I barely thought about them. It felt like they would always be there. Like there would always be another day when I could hold their hand whenever I wanted or hug them whenever I felt like it.
Now, those are the things I miss the most.
More than the big, special, unforgettable moments, I miss the ordinary kind of closeness. Walking side by side while holding someone’s hand. Hugging. Being kissed. Simply having the person I love beside me.
Sometimes I even miss the moments that happened but that I turned away from. It wasn’t wrong that I didn’t want to be hugged at that moment. But now, looking back, I find myself thinking, “I wish I had known that moment could have been the last.”
I even think about the simple things we planned to do together but never got around to doing. Making food for each other, sitting down and eating together, just having an ordinary day together… I never thought I would one day miss these things this much.
I think when you believe someone is going to remain in your life, you don’t realize how valuable the ordinary moments you share with them really are. You live as if they’re never going to leave.
Now I miss even the moments that never got to happen.
And I think this is what I’ve realized: You don’t have to live every moment as if it’s your last. But you shouldn’t mistake the beautiful things you experience with someone you love for something insignificant just because they’ve become ordinary. Because sometimes something as simple as someone hugging you or holding your hand while walking beside you can turn out to be one of the most precious things in your life.
Last updated on:2026-08-14T20:49:12+05:30
Comments (4)
i used to beat myself up over the moments i pulled away too, but i had to remind myself that i was allowed to have boundaries then
after my breakup, i missed the stupid little things way more than the big dates or trips, just having someone beside me and reaching for their hand without thinking.
you think you’re grieving the person most right now, or the ordinary life you thought you’d keep having together?
I’m grieving both—the person I was with and the relationship we had. He was one of the most genuinely good-hearted people I’ve ever known. I just wish he could have controlled his anger; things could have been so much better if he had.