Hii, I need help, I would be really grateful for anyone to answer me.
He was a good friend of mine, but we had feelings for each other and he wanted to take our relationship to the next level — he wanted to buy me flowers, but I said it would be better if we stayed friends since I like older men, and he respected that. But then we saw each other again and my feelings came back. Our group of 7 people went out drinking, and I got so drunk that I peed myself and was falling down, and he sexually touched me, so he sexually assaulted me. Afterward, he said it didn't happen and that he doesn't remember anything. I felt used and I realized there was no consent (I actually counted his fingers several times so he wouldn't put those fingers where he was putting them). All the friends that were there were telling me that I made it up, that nothing happened, and no one believed me.I wrote to him about everything that happened and what he did, and he said he was in shock and that he was so sorry. I wrote back that it would be better if we didn't talk anymore, so it ended. But I regret it so much and I love him, and I don't know what to do. I really want to text him so we can finally talk about what happened, for him to be honest, and maybe we could be together. But I ended it and I regret it so much, what should I do? Please just tell me, should I text him? If yes, what? Thank you for reading it, I know it's long, I will be very grateful for any advice or comments.
Last updated on:2026-08-17T16:15:57+05:30
Comments (9)
Please do not text him. I know you're feeling a deep sense of regret and longing right now, but what happened that night was sexual assault he took advantage of you when you were vulnerable and unable to consent. His initial denial, along with the reaction from your friend group, was classic gaslighting which makes it completely normal for you to feel confused and doubt your own boundaries. An apology after being caught doesn't mean he is safe to be around or ready to offer genuine honesty. Reaching out won't bring you the closure or healthy relationship you deserve, and you did the right thing by ending contact to protect yourself. Please consider leaning on a trusted professional, support service, or a counselor who can help you process this trauma. You deserve friends and a partner who respect your boundaries completely.
i’d leave that door closed for now. i kept wanting closure from someone who couldn’t give it to me, and every conversation just hurt me again.
i really feel for you because you can love someone and still be hurt by what they did. when you imagine texting him, are you hoping for an honest conversation, or hoping he’ll say something that makes you feel safe enough to love him again?
wow, thats deep question, thank you for comment, i hoping for both honestly.
you deserve better and if he did do that then he needs to be held accountable for it
yeah, you are rightt, thank you for comment
@Miska hope your ok
i’ve been in that place where you miss someone so badly that you start questioning what happened to you. please don’t text him hoping he’ll give you the answers or honesty you deserved.
thank you for comment