hi there folks i need your advice
i met this gorgeous guy in my friend's bd party and after that he was trying all ways possible to get to know me even he came to my university and after 3 months i agreed to know him and we went out as a group of friends and the whole time he was besides me just to talk to me after the outing he take my number and we began talking until we became boyfriend and girlfriend
this story was 3 years ago he was still a student, now he freshly graduated and got a job as a sales " he graduated as an engineer" but he couldn't find anything related to his field so he went for any job he had found. from the time he started a new job he didn't take care of me as mich as we first dated in the first 2 years sometimes i accepted it and sometimes i can't. until one day we got into a fight and i said " you dont do anything for me" and i meant by that the period when he got a new job not from the 1st day we met he thought i meant from the 1st day we met. he broke up with me. after 2 weeks we got back together as friends but each time there's a small conflict he says that we should sperate and never talk again and the next day says he's sorry. this continues to 2 months and then i told him that we should not talk again and we didn't talk for 2 weeks and then we communicated and went back together and for 2 weeks
one day on my birthday, he said that he doesn't love me anymore and for the first time he removed me on every social media platform and its been a month since we last communicated
my friend of mine called him and he said that " she was pressureing me so much and im doing all of this for her and to get married as soon as she graduates 'i will graduate in june,2027' and all she does pressuring me for not answering or not calling and im sick of this i cant handle this anymore"
the most important part that is im not a virgin he is the guy who have taken my virginity and im from a country where if my parents or my husband found out that im not a virgin they will kill me
and for this matter he said to my friend that he will never leave me alone in this situation and will marry me and then we can have a divorce
but a marriage in my country requires alot of money like the girl will pay at least 1 million for her share and the man will pay at least 3-6 millions for an apartment and 1-2 million to get the furniture and etc , in total marriage here is soooooo expensive
and I don't have this kind of money neither he is so our parents will share so how we will pay this much and then divorce??
and also in my culture the women who is a divorced women she's a lame for the country and no one will wants to marry her again
but we broke up like 1 year ago and he said the same thing to me and i said how? its not how things work but after a while he said that he was not gonna divorce me and said i was saying anything but the moment i will marry u i will not divorce u ofc because i will never love someone like u and by the time we are married im sure we will have sorted everything between us
so what should i do ?
Last updated on:2026-08-22T01:37:12+05:30
Comments (3)
i'd be really careful about marrying him just because you're scared of what happens if you don't. marriage, divorce, money, and your family's reaction are huge things to tie together when the relationship itself has been this unstable
i keep thinking about one thing, if the fear about your virginity and your family's reaction disappeared completely, would you still choose this man and this marriage?
this is so much to carry at once. i've been in a relationship where every little conflict turned into “maybe we should end this,” and eventually i was terrified to say anything because i never knew if i'd lose the person again