I know I need to focus on myself and I trust that this pain will fade eventually but I’m posting to see if anyone else is going through this right now.
I’ll be having a genuinely good time with friends and actively working on healing when suddenly he pops into my head. Out of nowhere my chest hurts and deep sadness hits me. It’s hard knowing he seems completely fine and happy—I just wish I could be in his shoes and share those moments again.
On top of that every time I feel a spark of happiness it feels like I'm officially letting him go. Intellectually I know letting go is the goal but emotionally it’s so heavy and difficult. Has anyone else experienced this struggle while trying to heal?
Last updated on:2026-09-12T05:51:12+05:30
Comments (7)
i used to feel guilty every time i caught myself enjoying life, like being happy meant i was leaving him behind too fast.
i’ve felt that sudden sadness too, especially when it seemed like my ex was doing perfectly fine. do you think part of what hurts is missing him, or is it also missing the version of your life you had when he was in it?
yes, im right there with you. I seem to I want to hold onto him or this pain. its so tricky. im 57 and scared ill never be loved again. my wise mind knows that I need to love myself.
Every day at Uni I'll be laughing and just being a completely normal person, but at the end, what matters is what is in my mind. I haven't been able to let go and even though people around me only notice I'm going through a hard time, they don't realize how hard it is to let go of someone so important, the pain of knowing they're with someone else and they don't care about getting back together anymore
its so painful to know he's not into me the rejection kills but its part of a breakup and others have gotten through this so we can too.
i know this feeling so well. i could be laughing with friends and having a genuinely good day, then one random thought about my ex would hit and suddenly my chest felt heavy again
Going through this..was at a anime convention and saw so many things she would have liked..cosplayers she would squeel about
You explained it perfectly..feeling happy feels like letting go..we don't want to but we should.
It will get better..it has to.