My boyfriend of nearly three years suddenly dumped me yesterday right after I had to visit the hospital due to severe distress over our relationship. He was my first everything and I am devastated.
Even though I’ve been actively managing my anxiety and OCD with therapy and medication he admitted he lied for months about being exhausted by my mental health. During our breakup talk he insulted our sex life said a future with me would "suck" and then held me physically while telling me I'm still his "beautiful smart girl."
To make matters worse my parents are angry with me and a close friend I previously supported through her own crisis is now being harsh instead of comforting me. Having people constantly walk away due to my mental health has left me with deep trust issues and a feeling that everyone is against me. I don't know how to cope with this raw pain or find a reason to keep going right now.
Last updated on:2026-10-23T13:00:11+05:30
Comments (3)
i had an ex who would tear me down with the most cruel words and then call me his sweet girl while physically trapping me in the room, and that mindfuck nearly broke me completely.
I am reading your post and I just want you to know: I hear you, and you are not alone.
Even though I don't know your exact story, I have walked somewhere very similar. I once had a relationship end after three years, too. I also supported a friend through her struggles, only to have her completely disappear and not be there for me when I needed her the most. I deeply know what it’s like to face mental health challenges and feel like no one is there when you need them most.
I am bipolar and I deal with social anxiety. Like you, I actively manage my conditions with medication and counseling. So I completely understand what you mean when you say you are doing everything you can to manage it.
When we are hurting so badly, it is devastating when the people around us pull away. I've had to learn about something called 'caregiver burnout,' which I only found out about recently. Over time, I’ve had to learn the hard way that I can’t put all of my stress onto one person. But reading what you shared about your ex, it doesn't sound like that was just you dumping on him—it sounds like you were relying on your counselor, your family, your friend, and getting hospital support, too.
My own ex once said to me, 'I'm not your emotional support animal.' I remember telling him, 'I know how to regulate my emotions and moods.' The truth is, some people just don't know how to be there for others, or how to truly reflect and validate each other's emotions. Sometimes, people also have bad days and just can’t show up because they are burnt out themselves. It hurts so much when someone else has a bad day on top of our bad day. Through a lot of hard lessons, I’ve had to learn to ask people, 'Is now a good time to talk?' and try not to take it personally if they say they are too tired or busy.
But what your ex did—lying to you for months, insulting your sex life, telling you a future with you would 'suck,' and then holding you while calling you his 'beautiful smart girl'—is deeply confusing and cruel. Please be gentle with yourself. Your parents and your friend not showing up right now hurts on a whole other level, but it does not mean everyone is against you, even though it feels that way in this raw, agonizing moment.
Please just take it one breath at a time right now. You are worthy of love, you are trying your absolute best, and I am holding you in my heart tonight
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. You deserve love, patience, and kindness, especially when you’re struggling. Having anxiety or OCD doesn’t make you difficult to love, and it doesn’t make you any less worthy of a healthy relationship. You were trying your best to manage your mental health, and you deserved honesty instead of months of lies and hurtful words. His mixed signals don’t define your worth or mean you weren’t enough. Please don’t let the way people are treating you convince you that everyone will leave or that you’re alone in this world. You don’t have to figure everything out today. Take it one moment at a time, lean on your therapist or someone you feel safe with, and please remember that your life is worth so much more than this relationship. You deserve to heal, to feel safe, and to be loved without feeling like a burden. ❤️