Why i chose no contact after my ex reached out

After 31 days of no contact, my ex reached out to my dad saying he wanted to drop off my things and give me a letter. I agreed to the letter—but not contact.

Then he found a way to message me anyway.

At first, it sounded like everything I had hoped for. He said he loved me, that he’d do anything to get me back, that he forgave me for everything, that he was working on himself. For a moment, I believed maybe things could be different.

But the moment I opened up and showed that I still cared… everything shifted.

Suddenly, I was being interrogated about going on a dating app while we were broken up. I had talked to a few people—nothing serious, nothing that ever went anywhere—but somehow it turned into me being accused, judged, and shamed. I even found myself explaining a small lie I told because I was afraid of how he’d react… and that became the focus instead of everything else.

The truth is—I missed him the entire time.

But none of that mattered. It was never enough.

What followed was the same pattern I know too well:

Twisting my words

Questioning my character

Making me feel like I’m “not enough” or “not honest”

Ignoring the hurt he caused me

He even asked me to write down my past sexual history. He made assumptions about me, shamed me, and turned things into something they weren’t.

And the hardest part?
He seemed more concerned about what I told others about his behavior than the actual pain he caused me.

There was verbal abuse. There was physical abuse. And when I brought it up, it was flipped back onto me.

The pattern became clear:
When he thought he might lose me, he pulled me in.
When he felt I was all in, he pushed me away.

And this time, he ended it again—while ignoring everything that actually mattered.

I feel hurt. I feel embarrassed for letting him back in. But more than anything, I feel done.

I don’t want a love that feels like anxiety, confusion, and walking on eggshells.
I don’t want a relationship that breaks over and over again.
I don’t want to be with someone who makes me question my worth.

So I’m choosing peace. I’m choosing no contact. I’m choosing to remove myself completely—even from social media—so I can finally heal.

This isn’t easy. But I know I deserve a healthy, safe, consistent love.

And I’m not going back.

Last updated on:2026-03-29T09:42:37+05:30