my boyfriend and i were together for a little over a year. we had normal arguments here and there but nothing major. last month things started falling apart and two weeks ago we officially broke up in person. he told me he was emotionally checked out didn’t love me anymore felt happier without the relationship and said if i didn’t collect my things that day he’d throw them away.
later that night i called because he still had my stuff and i had his too. he suddenly changed his mind and said we’d deal with it later just not anytime soon. it’s now been two weeks and he completely ignores every message even the ones only about getting my belongings back. i’m only blocked on a couple socials everywhere else i’m just ignored.
what confuses me is his behavior keeps feeling mixed. last saturday he randomly redownloaded snapchat even though he barely uses it and mostly only talked to me there then deleted it again hours later. a few days ago i noticed he unblocked my instagram checked it then blocked me again within minutes. right after that he downloaded snapchat again for a short time and deleted it again too. today i messaged asking for my things back and still got no response.
i still love and miss him a lot and i do respect his decision if he’s truly done. but his actions feel all over the place. he says he’s emotionally checked out but then keeps doing little things that make me question it. he also has autism which maybe plays a part in how he handles shutting down emotionally i honestly don’t know.
BIG UPDATE: we still have this app where i can see what music he listens to and he was playing MY favorite song today. not even the original version the acoustic one i always loved. he never even listens to that artist. now i’m sitting here wondering if any of this means something or if i’m just reading too deeply into it because i miss him.
Last updated on:2026-05-08T06:23:43+05:30
Comments (4)
do not accept that bread crumbing. it’s incredibly disrespectful of the space you need. love doesn’t require intense anxiety especially if he chose to discard you when it was hard to lean toward you when you needed it most.
the stuff situation feels really unfair though. do you think he’s avoiding giving your things back because he’s confused too, or because he knows it keeps a connection between you two?
i’ve been stuck in that loop before, reading into every unblock, every song, every tiny online move because i wanted it to mean they still cared. honestly sometimes they DO still care, but that doesn’t always mean they want the relationship back and that part hurt like hell for me
Honestly I’ve been going through something similar and the thing you have to grasp is if he wanted to reach out and talk he would don’t read too much into it he probably does miss you and wants to know how your doing but the bottom line is if he wanted to he would and he isn’t so dont keep hoping for something that might never happen