I recently got out of a relationship with someone i was not dating. We were each others everything but we ended up hurting each other with our actions. I became more of an anxious attachment style while she was an avoidant. We tried a relationship but it didn’t work out so we continued as no label. But we ended up hurting each other I always wanted to fix things but it was difficult. I would always end up trying to find things out if she was doing this behind my back and to an avoidant which broke her boundary. I sometimes ended up finding stuff but when i didn’t i’d genuinely invade that boundary and would end up in her business and ruin relationships she had with her friends. I just wanted things to go well but in the end the wounds we had on each other got bigger. The pressure got too much for her so she broke she wanted to end things while i wanted to fix things. I am slowly learning to accept that the way we were and the wounds we had even if we tried to talk it out and fix things it would only be a bandaid over those. So i’m giving her space and time, I blocked her on socials so i’d not end up seeing or wondering how she’s doing. I don’t hate her and we both still have that love and the way we were both we wouldn’t be able to work right now. I don’t hate her for the things she did and hope she’s doing well. It’s only been 2 days since our last conversation and when she told me that it was over but i yearn for her but understand that there is nothing i can do and it hurts.
Last updated on:2026-07-26T05:46:46+05:30
Comments (9)
i had to learn that love alone wasn’t enough when the same patterns kept reopening the same hurts. giving space was the hardest thing i did, but it helped me finally see myself outside of the relationship.
i’ve been in that anxious and avoidant cycle too, where both people cared so much but kept triggering each other’s wounds. i remember loving someone and still knowing we were hurting each other.
when you blocked her, was it mostly to protect yourself from checking on her, or were you hoping she’d realize how much you cared and reach out? i’ve struggled with that line too.
it was for myself to protect myself i haven’t blocked her on messages. I just didn’t wanna be checking her socials see what she was doing etc
i will probably end up unblocking her i just didn’t wanna be tripping writhin the first few days wondering how she was handling things
Sorry, hope you choose yourself every day
i’m trying
The anxious and avoidant combination is the most difficult to navigate. I inderstand exactly what you are going through.
it really is i did things that put too much pressure and handled things not as best as i could have