i broke up with my boyfriend a few days ago even though there wasn’t some official “we’re done” conversation. everything exploded after i found things on his phone that completely broke me especially after everything i’ve already forgiven over the last four years.
he’s always been emotionally distant with me and would accuse me of cheating even though i never gave him a reason to doubt me. when i confronted him this time and got emotional he grabbed me by my clothes and hit me. twice. all because i was upset.
part of me knows this relationship wasn’t healthy but i still miss him so much and feel completely lost without him. his family and even his friends have told him before that he needs to treat me better but nothing ever changes. sometimes i honestly feel like he never truly liked me the way i liked him. he constantly follows girls that look nothing like me and it destroyed my self esteem over time.
he was my first for so many things which makes this hurt even more. he never apologizes never checks on me never seems to care how badly he’s hurt me. right now i just feel heartbroken and stupid for giving four important years of my life to someone who made me feel unloved most of the time.
Last updated on:2026-05-21T03:36:12+05:30
Comments (6)
It’s really hard initially, but you will move on eventually. Just remember the worst parts of your relationship in times of weakness. It won’t get better, it only gets worse.
When somebody puts their hands on you, It's time to end the relationship.
Your attachment system will miss him and that’s ok. You should allow yourself to feel these things but you also need to recognise that someone who has lied to you and then attacked you is dangerous for you. This isn’t the type of behaviour that can change easily or even at all. It’s not worth the risk or time
First of all, I hope you are okay sweetie. Press charges against him. There should be zero tolerance for abuse.
secondly, I am very proud of you for walking out of the relationship. It was hurting you more than it was serving you.
You were in the relationship longer than you should have because you’re trauma bonded with him. That’s the reason you miss him as well.
Please maintain absolutely no contact. Block him everywhere for at least 3 months. EVERYWHERE.
It;s not wasted years. You have enjoyed it at times, learned from it, grew from it etc. Look at the positive net result. Time to move on from him and remember the lessons this relationship taught you
Good for you for getting out of that relationship. Some things are simply unforgivable. Abuse is unforgivable. You did the right thing leaving.