Why does breakup pain feel so deep?

Author

I'll just say you should look over some of my other posts.

Basically I had what I thought was a life partner. we dated for 3 yrs everything was pretty great till about the last 6 months.

we had some arguments/disagreement. she wasn't the type to talk things out either she'd rather stop talking and try and ignore the problems. so when id bring them up she'd ignore me for days or a week.

finally she told me she needed a break and I said okay.

a week later I find out she started dating a new guy on the ssme day we took our "break" and is sleeping with him.

that hurt more then I can describe.

A couple days ago I crashed out so hard emotionally..Id drank a lot...my sister came and got me because she was worried about what I might do.

how do you deal with the pain? do you just let it go? ignore it?...

I lost my parents and this hurts more then that.

Last updated on:2026-06-02T20:30:46+05:30

Comments (7)

lightstar11
lightstar11 2 mths ago

the pain is mostly from losing her, or from realizing the relationship may have been over for her long before she told you

ItsNotEasy
ItsNotEasy 2 mths ago

maybe you are right.

cryeye
cryeye 2 mths ago

when i was in that kind of pain, alcohol made everything ten times louder and darker. i'm really glad your sister showed up for you, and i hope you're talking to someone in your life about those thoughts, not carrying them alone. if those urges come back hard, please reach out to a crisis line or emergency support where you are.

Jejjja
Jejjja 2 mths ago

my ex started seeing someone else almost immediately after we ended, and that part BROKE me more than the breakup itself. finding out she was with him the same day the "break" started would mess with anyone's head

ItsNotEasy
ItsNotEasy 2 mths ago

glad its not just me..she seemed to be okay with it all like I meant nothing..

PTMF
PTMF 2 mths ago

I also had an episode of heavy drinking few weeks ago. I blacked out. The most dangerous thing! Maybe we have to avoid drinking for some time. Cannot ignore my pain, I just have to learn to live with it eventually.

ItsNotEasy
ItsNotEasy 2 mths ago

Hopefully i can learn to live with it eventually.