Why can't i stop checking his phone?

i’m only on 7 days NC and the most i’ve been able to do is 2 weeks. i’m honestly struggling in most areas of my life- I just started a new job and have a hard time focusing and not crying. I have frequent moments of anxiety and where my heart randomly starts racing. I get triggered by things and it’s hard for me to hold it together sometimes. he completely destroyed my nervous system yet I miss him so much. the last thing he told me after I said I couldn’t work towards getting back together was to never reach out to him again and he f***ing hated me :( he normally blocks me on everything but hasn’t this time so I feel so weird about that and find myself frequently checking if i’m blocked :( he has also had his phone on DND literally since the last time we have spoken which is not normal. I’m worried I am delaying my healing by checking that kind of stuff but I can’t stop it and just want to feel like myself again :(

Last updated on:2026-07-11T05:04:58+05:30

Comments (12)

MeanEcho6
MeanEcho6 2 wks ago

whether i was blocked like it would somehow tell me how he felt. every tiny change became a clue in my head. those first couple weeks were absolute HELL 💔

CoolBreeze388
CoolBreeze388 2 wks ago

yes literally! i’m constantly checking :(

Geoterry
Geoterry 2 wks ago

starting a new job while your heart is doing this is so much to carry.

CoolBreeze388
CoolBreeze388 2 wks ago

yes it really is, thank you! and it’s like i don’t want to talk to my coworkers about it because I don’t know them like that and ugh

Dumas10
Dumas10 2 wks ago

was the relationship already making you feel anxious before the breakup, or did all of this start after he left?

CoolBreeze388
CoolBreeze388 2 wks ago

it was already making me feel anxious… there was definitely emotional abuse and control so i was so anxious all the time :/

FrostJet725
FrostJet725 2 wks ago

also well done on 7 days. that's huge!

CoolBreeze388
CoolBreeze388 2 wks ago

thank you so so much. honestly when i’ve wanted to text him i just remember he asked me not to and that i want to be respectful of what he said, even if he doesn’t mean it

FrostJet725
FrostJet725 2 wks ago

I know its hard but maybe you should block him so you don't keep checking? Startling a new job is a great distraction. when im at work and I feel the urge to cry, I feel myself that I can cry as soon as I finish and distract myself. as soon as I get in my car at the end if the day, I cry my heart out and then go home.

CoolBreeze388
CoolBreeze388 2 wks ago

I thought about that but I feel guilty and have a hard time blocking anyone.. I can’t bring myself to do it. and that’s what i’m gonna start doing because I have a hard time forcing myself to hold it together and have cried in the bathroom :/

FrostJet725
FrostJet725 2 wks ago

@CoolBreeze388 blocking people is hard. My ex has a heart condition, so the thought of blocking him and something happening stresses me out.

CoolBreeze388
CoolBreeze388 2 wks ago

@FrostJet725 yeah I can totally understand that. mine doesn’t have anything like that but idk i know i shouldn’t after what he said but i want him to still have the ability to reach me if he needed or something happens but i still care for him and always will