So im 2 hours off of day 10. I am not going to lie. The past 24 hours has been by far the hardest. The urge to reach out has been so strong, it is taking all if my strength not to.
I know its my nervous system, because my head tells me all the reasons not to. But the anxiety in my chest is brutal, and hearing his voice would relieve it.. but I know it would be only for a moment.
I don't know what else to say. This is rough and I really miss him, even though in my heart I know things weren't really working. 🤷♀️😭
Last updated on:2026-07-19T03:35:08+05:30
Comments (7)
i'm really glad you're listening to your head, even while your chest is screaming. every time i gave in and reached out, i got a few minutes of relief and then i had to start healing all over again.
yeah i definitely don't want that. I really have to put my healing first.
when you imagine reaching out, are you hoping he'd help fix things, or do you just want the anxiety to quiet down for a little while?
day 10 was actually harder for me than day 2 because the shock had worn off and all i wanted was one call to make the ache stop. it passed, even though i swore it wouldn't.
Yeah it really was a d8fficult day. im guessing its probably going to get worse before it gets better
I promised myself I would do the 30 days and if I still feel the same I can reach out then. I was just reading some old messages. Even in February he was saying the same thing to me, that he loves me but he needs this time to find himself.
if someone keeps telling you the same thing, and I refuse to believe it .. then it becomes a me problem. I am very aware of that.
youve got this. you have made it this far you need to tell yourself and have no doubt that this will help you heal.