For context, my ex and I broke up after more than two years, and we're currently sorting out getting our belongings back.
He asked if he could have his box of love letters/Open-when-Letters back, and I said no (because wtf it was a gift to our first anniversary). He after i said no mentioned that there were €20 in one of the letters and that he kindly wanted to ask for that money. 💀 The audacity is insane when he literally cancelled our shared Spotify subscription after I'd already transferred him the money, leaving me €8.50 out of pocket.
Then he asked if he could give me back some of the presents I gave him because he'd otherwise throw them away. Like??? Put them in a box in the basement if you don't want them anymore. Why would you even ask me that? It's just unnecessarily hurtful.
I genuinely don't know what to say anymore. I'm so angry and I can feel myself starting to hate him, which is weird and hurtful when I spent two years loving him. Part of me wants to curse all his belongings before giving them back. Honestly..I'm just so fucking done with this whole situation.
Last updated on:2026-10-11T18:59:48+05:30
Comments (8)
Curse the belongings! Why not. Lol. I cursed my ex for months before I prayed for God to lift the curses lol. It’s called the anger stage of grief. Agaib you are dealing with a man child. Woukd you get mad at a 2 year old for flinging food across the room? Absokurely not. they are two. You need to realize who you are dealing with. This is not a logical emotionally grown adult. So adjust your expectations accordingly.
How did you respond to all this?
LMAO honestly the urge to curse his stuff was REAL 😭😂 And yeah, I think I'm definitely in the anger stage right now. I ended up telling him exactly what I thought about his behaviour and that he won't be getting that 20€ back. Also called him out on the 8,50€ but he didn't say any to it and haven't gotten them back either so i said he should just keep that shit. But I couldn't keep pretending his behaviour was okay just to keep the peace.
He responded with a long message basically saying he didn't want to discuss anything anymore, that blocking me was his decision and that he wanted no further contact.
Honestly, I'm starting to accept that I can't keep expecting him to treat me the way I would've treated him. It still hurts, but I'm also relieved to be out of this relationship. I just wish I hadn't had to learn this at all.
@Clayton111 oh hun.. you HAD to learn this all. It’s so unfortunate but you HAD to. imagine learning through all this while going through a divorce, splitting the house, assets and maybe kids involved?? God is protecting you. Be grateful. We both have HaD to learn this because of our codependency issues, and to learn how to trust ourselves better and protect our boundaries. Also, dude, mine fucking used to eat all my food, sleep overs etc, I’m running out of groceries faster, I bought an e-pill and the daily pill for US, then I asked him to split the cost of the daily pill and to pay for the second e-pill, literally like $3. To this DAY, I have not even seen that money.
There are words for these types of men..brokies, dusties (and be careful coz you can catch a cold). These men have 0% shame and 1000% audacity.
And the problem is they can also be very kind, charming, sweet, funny, feel like they ‘get us’, like they can have a really sweet side! and us we go falling in love with. them, then we meet the demon inside of them and it’s so incompatible with the rest of them we actually think we’re hallucinating, or they’ve forgotten who they truly are (which is this sweet angel) and then we embark on this journey of helping them find themselves!
when the truth is that, and personally I don’t understand it like it needs to be scientifically studied, it’s like how can darkness and light exist in the same room? it’s impossible right? I mean okay yeah with a candle it is but I mean half the room is full of light half dark split down the middle like pure darkness pure light, it’s impossible?
and that’s us when we’re fighting for the relationship. we’re looking at this room fucking confused like wtf is this, the day we meet the darkness, and we try to figure out how can these both co-exist, am I crazy? like what dimension am I in??
it’s literal I sanity. to somehow realize a person is both warm, and ice, funny and mean, sweet and emotionally immature, uplifting and condescending, love and pure and I mean PURE wvil. it’s a fucking mind trip.
May God protect you and give you discernment to never fall into that trap again. And may you deal with codependency issues so that the next time you meet that darkness you don’t go ‘let me try turn it into light’ ‘let me try and turn a black hole into a sun’ you just go ‘oops! block, delete, and move on.’
It’s a journey you had to learn, and so be thankful you’re learning it now and not with tons and tons and tons of baggage.
my ex once tried to reclaim little things he'd given me after we split, and it made me furious because suddenly every sentimental thing felt like a fucking transaction. i can totally see why the €20 thing pushed you over the edge.
getting stuck in that angry phase too, where every tiny interaction made me hate them a little more. what helped me was making the belongings exchange as boring and emotionless as possible, because i was DONE giving those logistics any more of my energy.
i’d be furious too, especially after the spotify money and then the presents on top of it. do you think you're more hurt by the actual requests, or by how cold and transactional everything feels after two years together?
I think it’s the actual request that hurt me honestly. Because everyone knows that it's basic manners to not ask for gifts back no matter. If i would've done that he would need to send me more than 1k back 💀. So the audacity is just crazy
asking for things he gifted to you just shows how much he doesn't care about you anymore. even if I broke up with someone I wouldn't ask for all the things I bought for them back. I would just say if it's escalated to this point ask yourself if getting your belongings back is worth all of this attitude, just for your own mental health.