There's genuinely so much going on in my head right now, and I kinda need some outside perspectives.
Since the breakup, some of my friends who used to be friends with my ex too(we all where a friendgroup), have started reconnecting with me. They all fell out with him (and also me because they didn't wanna make me choose) because of things he said and never apologised for. And now they've been telling me that I seem so much more open, happier, and almost like a completely new person. Which is honestly crazy to hear, but also kinda makes me think about how much that relationship affected me without me fully realising it.
And something else I've noticed is that I feel SO much more attractive now?? 😭 Like I actually enjoy putting together hot outfits, going clubbing with friends, posting on Insta, and just having fun with myself again. And no, it's not because I want my ex to see any of it because he literally can't. #blocked 💀
I think there might be a few guys interested in me, too, although I'm honestly not sure. I'm definitely not ready for another serious relationship yet, but like... a guy can fantasise, right? LMAO.
There's one guy in particular who I suspect might be interested in me. He's not really my type in terms of compatibility and lifestyle, believes, we just don't seem to be on the same wavelength. But I've caught myself thinking that if something happened between us, I'd actually be down to make out with him.
And that thought kinda scares me because I've ALWAYS been the hopeless romantic type. I've never been a player, I've always taken romance seriously, and I've never really understood casual stuff. I'm also asexual, so attraction and intimacy have always been a little different for me anyway.
My ex was my first relationship and my first everything romantically, so I genuinely have ZERO experience with dating, flirting, casual situationships, or anything like that. I don't even know what I'm doing. 😭
Part of me wonders if this is just my brain desperately looking for dopamine after a breakup, or if I'm finally allowing myself to explore things I never got to experience before. Maybe I just enjoy feeling attractive and wanted again. Maybe I want to experience something without immediately attaching a whole romantic future to it. Or maybe I'm just going through a phase that'll pass.
I don't want to jump into anything I'm not ready for but I also don't want to limit myself just because I've always been a certain type of person.
So what do you guys think? Did you experience something similar after your first relationship? Is it normal to suddenly become more open to casual stuff after being a hopeless romantic? Would you experiment a little if you were in my position, or would you give yourself more time to heal first?
I'm curious about your experiences because I genuinely have no idea what I'm doing here.
Last updated on:2026-10-13T02:07:29+05:30
Comments (5)
i was suddenly dressing up, going out, feeling HOT again, and wondering where that version of me had been hiding the whole relationship. i think i was finally getting parts of myself back that i'd forgotten about.
yeah i relate to that so much, it feels kinda strange in a good way. I'm happy for you that you got that part of yourself back aswell!
used to think every bit of attraction had to lead somewhere serious, but giving myself permission to enjoy a little flirting without promising anyone my heart was freeing. i'd just be honest with myself and the other person about what i actually want, especially when intimacy is involved.
do you feel genuinely excited about the idea of making out with this guy, or is it more the thought of being desired and discovering this new side of yourself that feels exciting
Honestly, I'm not sure yet. I guess I have time to figure that out and there's no rush. I don't want to force anything, so I'll just see how I feel and go from there.