it's been 2 weeks now I started to feel better and like I was moving on but last night I just started crying and now I have that pain again in my stomach she'll Always be in my mind. i tried moving on but it's pointless. I wanted to contact her or her parents to ask her how she is but I don't want to push her away even more so I didn't. but it's so difficult
Last updated on:2026-03-07T06:59:56+05:30
Comments (5)
i know that exact feeling. are you missing her the most at night, or does it hit you randomly during the day too?
I think of her all the time. but sometimes it just hits harder for some reason. I dont cry everyday anymore though
honestly the thing that saved me early on was not reaching out, even when i wanted to SO bad. i wrote the messages in my notes instead and never sent them.
i was “doing better” around week three too, then one random night i was crying on my kitchen floor again. two weeks is still so fresh, your brain is just catching up.
I can see how much this is weighing on you. It’s incredibly painful when you feel like you’re finally turning a corner, only for the grief to hit you all over again. Holidays and special occasions are often the hardest—they act like a magnifying glass on the silence.
I’ve been there. I remember how agonizing it was not to contact my ex on his birthday or send a gift. I still loved him deeply, but I had to choose what was best for my long-term healing. While I can't tell you what the 'right' choice is for your specific situation, I truly believe the answer is already within you if you can find a quiet moment to listen to it."
Questions to Evaluate Your Heart
Before you reach out to her or her parents, try asking yourself these three things to see if it aligns with what you truly need:
The 'Why' Check: Am I reaching out because I genuinely expect a positive, healing conversation, or am I just trying to soothe the temporary 'stomach-drop' pain I’m feeling right now?
The Outcome Test: If she responds coldly, or doesn't respond at all, will that set my healing back further than where I am today?
The Long-Term Goal: Does contacting her parents help me build a life where I am whole on my own, or does it keep me tethered to a door that has already closed?
Resources That Helped Me
I also wanted to share two things that have been a lifeline for me lately:
Reading: I started a book called Single on Purpose (or Breakup on Purpose) by John Kim. It’s been so helpful in reframing this time as an investment in myself rather than just a loss of 'us.'
Healing the Brain: I’ve been using an app called Heal EMDR. It helps process the painful memories so they don't feel so 'loud' and overwhelming.
Think of your brain like a massive Email Inbox:
When a breakup happens, the memories are like "High Priority" unread emails that keep popping up at the top of your inbox with bright red flags. They stay in your "short-term" processing center, constantly demanding your attention and making your heart race every time you see them.
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) acts like an automated filing system. As you follow the movements:
It "opens" those high-stress emails.
It strips away the "Urgent" red flags and the loud attachments.
It moves them from the "Inbox" (short-term/active distress) into the "Archived" folder (long-term memory).
The emails are still there—you haven't deleted the history—but they are no longer screaming for your attention. They become part of your past storage rather than a current emergency.