He left very out of the blue, one day he was all in, the next he was leaving but couldn’t really give me a reason other than “I just feel like I can’t be with you at this point in my life”. We were long distance for college but we were 1 month away from being home for summer. We didn’t date very long, I was his first everything and he definitely was emotionally cautious but he REALLY liked me and I’m not imagining that.
When he returns for summer (I’m already home) I’ve thought about asking for a conversation to get closure.
The only problem is that if he is thinking about maybe trying things again, or he does miss me, I don’t want to push him away further by having an emotionally charged conversation that no doubt would be uncomfortable for him since he is so inexperienced.
At the end of the day I just want to give things one more chance. I know I can’t ask for that. It’s so painful. It’s either I ask and I *maybe* get closure (though tbh i’m not entirely convinced he even knows exactly why he left) or we never speak again???
The last time we texted he said he thinks space is best for us to both move forward. But I don’t WANT to move forward. We didn’t even get a real chance, we hardly spent any time together and we were about to have 3 months how could he just suddenly not want that. Is there anything I could say to change his mind??
Is my silence more likely to bring him back?
Last updated on:2026-05-15T21:06:11+05:30
Comments (8)
i know the silence feels unbearable, but honestly the only thing that helped me was stopping myself from trying to manage his feelings for him. if he wanted another chance, he’d have to meet me halfway.
the “we were just about to have the whole summer together” part would haunt me too 😭 did he seem overwhelmed by the long distance itself, or more by how serious the relationship started feeling to him?
I honestly don’t know, he didn’t seem overwhelmed until the day he was breaking up with me. That’s part of why I’m so confused
my ex left me right before we were finally supposed to close the distance too, and i drove myself insane trying to figure out what magic words could make him stay. sometimes they really do care and still leave anyway
I think you should ask for a meeting but go into it without expectations. Maybe just framing it as: I wanna know why you broke up with me and get some clarification, not to get back together. This way u can get a learning experience out of it and heal for yourself faster. if he truly did leave you so abruptly, odds are something bigger than you. Either he doesn’t know how to handle his feelings or there’s something else happening inside his mind.
this kind of breakup hurts so much. Theres so many feelings of what could have been. My suggestion is to give him the space he wants. If he comes back, then he is truly in it for you.
I never wanted to move forward without him. But if he wasn't choosing me and chose to move forward without me, then I had to respect that and love myself enough to walk away without a fight
Life is short. Ask for that meeting. You don’t want to regret not asking. Good luck 🍀
keep your head up, keep moving forward, and know you're not alone friend ❤️