Why am i still thinking about him after everything?

so we broke up and he kept trying to keep me on social media after on again off again behavior.. then he was purposely flirting with other girls infront of me and saying today that I "ruined" it a long time ago. Like there was no context and then blaming me for him being emotionally unavailable and me getting screen recordings of him flirting with another woman is wild. He was such a hypocrite and his little female "friends" were weird. I know for a fact he is trash talking me to all of our friends because they don't talk to me anymore. I am so sick of his selfish bs. He always made it seem like I was the problem but he never realized just how deep he cut me emotionally and mentally. I felt so alone in every aspect. I was the one always calling and trying for it and he just treated my effort as if it was nothing. He almost tried to unalive himself... I tried to help as much as I could and had him throw everything up... I couldn't sleep for 3 days straight.. I was watching him and I contacted his Church and his family to help. Then he treats me like I am nothing. Like when he was going through a crisis I was there every step of the way. I never turned my back on him even when his friends left him to fend for himself. In my pain after my family member passed away in a car crash and another is doing intense chemo therapy for stage 4 cancer he doesn't care about anyone but himself. He ran back to the friends that sold him out during his darkest time. I would've protected him with my life at one point. Now I'm just treated as if I am nothing. I was trashed until he could try and find replacements. Why do I care so much? Why am I like this? I feel so stupid. I am so angry and hurt.

Last updated on:2026-05-25T10:23:11+05:30