Why do i feel like i'm going crazy after my breakup?

my avoidant ex and I have broke up so many times over 3 years that I can’t even count. This time I don’t think I would go back if he reached out. I am exhausted from it all. but yesterday I felt so good and convinced I deserve better and if he reached out I would tell him no. But today I spent all day at work wishing he would reach out he didn’t of course I was always the one that chased and fixed it. what is wrong with me one day I want nothing to do with him and today I am begging to myself for him to reach out ughhh this is tough

Last updated on:2026-05-13T16:52:20+05:30

Comments (8)

dutter00
dutter00 3 wks ago

nothing is wrong with you honestly. your brain got used to being the one who chased and repaired everything, so silence feels unnatural right now

selfilover
selfilover 3 wks ago

when you picture him reaching out, do you actually imagine things becoming healthy this time, or do you mostly imagine the temporary comfort of the cycle starting again?

HappyRoad931
HappyRoad931 3 wks ago

I know it would not be different. But my heart wishes it would

HappyRoad931
HappyRoad931 3 wks ago

I don’t get it really he is talking about marriage and moving back in and then I told him I was not ready for him to move in then he said well we should not talk anymore then bame it was over like he always does

FluxSnap258
FluxSnap258 3 wks ago

This is literally my story. A friend told me today that I was the glue that held us together and he would only take me back after I reached out each and every time because I was willing to put up with his bs not because he valued us, or loved me but because I was available. That thought really shifted my perspective today. We deserve to be fought for. Look at how easily they let us go.

HappyRoad931
HappyRoad931 3 wks ago

yes I agree that was the same for me he never fought for us it was always me trying to fix things never him. and that does hit home I was the glue that held us together. But not this time I am done fixing things that I did not break

FluxSnap258
FluxSnap258 3 wks ago

@HappyRoad931 today has been hard as hell, that truth truly broke me but we should keep pushing through. There’s better than this.

CozyAndLight514

Right now, he has the remote control to your feelings and emotions. When you’ll realise your self-worth, that would change the power dynamics. You’d have the control to yourself. You deserve to be chased, loved and appreciated. Just know that you’re amazing and you deserve someone equally amazing 🤍